I knew it! I just knew it: the job was going to make me grind my teeth. Good thing I stuck the mouth guard in before I started typing mind-numbing data. Boring. I hate boredom. Boredom frustrates me, and frustration makes me clench my teeth. Without that mouth guard I would’ve broken all the teeth in my mouth when Word “closed unexpectedly” just as I hit “Table > Sort > Sort by paragraphs • Ascending” on 29 single-spaced pages.
“We are sorry; Word had to close unexpectedly” means “You are screwed! Any data you haven’t manually saved is gone, and NO, there is no auto-recovery file backing up the work you were doing. And yes, we did calculate this so it would happen just as you were coming to the end of an hours-long slab of brain-banging labor.”
Word does that all the time. We figured out that it’s not a function of Wyrd for Mac, because Tina reported that her Wyrd for Windows does the same thing, and she runs it on a high-powered PC. I have Wyrd set to auto-save about every three minutes, plus I’ve learned to hit “Command > Save” after just about every sentence, phrase, and word. I’ve also set Wyrd to make back-up files as it goes, creating mounds of annoying clutter.
So no data was lost, but I didn’t know that until the system came back online. Frustrating, time-wasting, and annoying.
It seems to have something to do with tables. Apparently a lengthy or complicated table — one with bulleted points in it, for example — causes Word to crash.
First time this occurred, a client had constructed tables and stuck more tables inside some of the cells. He even put an image in one of the cells! The damn thing crashed if you just looked at it.
More recently, we edited a corporate book compiled of entries by a whole slew of authors. To enforce some sort of conformity, the PR director had come up with a tabular form, whose purpose was to regularize the content and format across the board. Great idea…but as soon as someone decided to enter a bulleted list in a cell, it would cause the whole elegant construct to crash.
Always just as the august editor was about to close out, having spent two hours laboring over the edits. I lost track of the number of hours we had to write off for that project because of Wyrd crashes. Six or eight, as I recall.
Then there was the author who inserted Japanese characters inside Word tables. Complicated, elaborate tables. CRASH!
What makes Word crash? Tables make Word crash!
Nothing was lost yesterday but some time that wouldn’t have been paid, anyway. It was my own project. But those recurring Word crashes sure are annoying.