Funny about Money

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. ―Edmund Burke

“Retire”…or no?


The endless doggy walk…

So this morning it occurred to me that maybe I should chuck all the paying work and call it, once and for all, True Retirement. Maybe what I really want to do in life is what SDXB does:


The truth is, I don’t want to work very hard. But on the other hand, the truth is I don’t work very hard. 🙂

The plan to build a substantial amount of exercise into daily life (so the mental argument went) will absorb a lot of time from my days. But the third truth in this calculation is that I spend an inordinate number of hours per day glued to computer screens. Frequently — not once in a while, but quite often — I will roll out of the sack, stumble into the office and check the email, then the news, then the work in progress, then Facebook, then Nextdoor, then the local news, then the email again…hours pass before I notice that I haven’t even fed the dogs.

This morning the poor little dogs didn’t get fed until after 9:30! And since we all overslept until 7:00 a.m., they must have been very hungry critters by the time I noticed it was past time to produce their chow.

But that’s not uncommon. I often sit around till 8 or 9 o’clock before feeding them or me. All of that time is pretty much wasted time: diddled away at the computer.

That is why I’ve become so sedentary and why I don’t get any exercise: I kill so much time diddling with or (sometimes) working at the computer, I can easily sit from 7 in the morning till 10 at night without getting up more than two or three times.

Is there a question why I have high blood pressure?

Well… I do like the work I do, almost as much as I like getting paid for it. And my business partner is now hot to change our business plan, reverting to a strategy used by a previous incarnation of the little corporation…when I had a co-conspirator who was pretty good at landing small government contracts for publishing and editorial projects.

These would, indeed, pay us a fair rate — which we do not get, most of the time, by working for individuals. And as she pointed out, two decent contracts a year would support us both.

So: that tends to work against the urge to board up the doors.

Daydreaming while making this morning’s dog-free walk, I wandered into Inner Richistan instead of heading directly home from the park. This added a half-mile to the stroll, making it a two-mile power walk.

Having noted the time I left, when I got home I discovered that the little journey had taken all of 34 minutes.

A mile-long doggy-walk takes about 20 or 25 minutes.

A yoga routine: 20 minutes.

One set of physical therapy exercises: about 10 minutes.

Let us suppose, for fudging’s sake, that a dog-free walk of two miles takes 40 minutes and a one-mile dog-walk takes 30 minutes. Two physical therapy sets are required per day.

So that would give us an exercise regimen that would add up to 40 minutes + 30 minutes + 20 minutes + 20 minutes: all of 110 minutes. That’s less than two hours.

At this time of year, days are short. I don’t usually wake up much before 7 a.m., and because it’s dark and often chilly, I go to bed early, around 9 p.m. That gives fourteen hours of usable waking time. In other words, I can do two hours of exercise and still have 12 hours left in which to do honest work.

Or what passes for it.

In the summertime, when we get up at 5 a.m. and go to bed around 10, the available workday time is 17 hours.

The problem here is not that I need to retire; it’s that I need to get off my duff.

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Author: funny

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