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Automobiles

Thank You, Good Realtor!!!

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Y’know, my good Realtor Friend, a guy named John Shackleford, did me one of the greatest favors anyone ever did for me: by bringing me to this house, in this neighborhood.

What a lovely, peaceful, pretty place to live!

Ruby and I just got back from one of our circumnavigations of the ‘Hood. And oh, my! What a pretty day.

The park: brilliant emerald green in the spring sunshine. The weather; insanely beautiful. The kids: playing magnificently in the park, kicking  balls and chasing around. The dogs: handsomely trotting along  beside their humans. The sky, delicately painted with fine, thin white clouds against a deep blue background. The birds: singing and flying around in avian joy.

What more could you possibly want, eh?

Just now, I can’t think of much.

It really is a beautiful, upper-middle-class North Central Phoenix neighborhood. Just about anything you want or need is within easy walking distance — as I’ve discovered to my amazement, now that my son has kiped my car.

Yes, it’s true: living here, I actually don’t need a car! Get rid of the chariot, and come to find out you have, within easy walking distance,

  • 3 top-flight grocery stores
  • a veterinarian
  • a computer store
  • a bookstore/computer software store
  • a hair stylist
  • a doctor (of sorts)
  • a magnificently stocked drugstore
  • 3 pharmacies
  • 2 major urban hospitals with top-rated emergency rooms
  • a fine young lawyer

One could go on and on…but basically, the message is, you can get about 95% of the goods and services you need without ever setting foot in a gasoline-powered vehicle. 

Y’know, this characteristic of the neighborhood never fully dawned on me until after my son kiped my car. I mean…well, of course I knew all these places were here. But until the car disappeared from my garage, it never really registered with me that I didn’t need to drive to these places!

Seriously: in the summertime, get going early enough and you can do your errands before the heat comes up. Raining? Call an Uber…like, the one whose owner lives straight across the streeet. (Turns out a half-dozen Uber drivers live right here in the Hood!)

It’s every bit as good as San Francisco in that way. When my mother and I lived there, back in the Dark Ages of the late 1950s and early 60s, we did have a car. But we never used it unless my mother and I had to drive across the Bay to pick up my father when his ship came in. (He was a Merchant Marine pilot.) I’d guess we never turned on the ignition more than twice a month.

And now, between Uber and just about every daily need within easy walking distance, I find myself in the same situation. I don’t really need a car! 

Mwa ha ha!!!

My son has it in his garage. And frankly, he can have the damn thing. I may sign over the registration to him, next time I have to pay for it.

Car? We Don’t Need No Steenking Car!

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LOL! Ever had that thought? The why am I spending 87 gerjillion bucks on this clunk thought? The what a PITA it is, schlepping this contraption in for its regular maintenance thought?

Yeah…..  Lately, I’ve been kinda haunted by that thought.

Main reason is that it has slowly but steadily dawned on me, now that we have a lightrail train cruising up and down Main Drag West and now that a rental car lot has taken up residence in a nearby shopping center and now that (duh!!!) I’ve come to realize I can reach three large grocery stores and a Walgreen’s on foot, none of them more than a ten-minute stroll away…that…yeah…maybe, just MAYBE I don’t need a car. 

Think o’ that!

Seriously: when I need a ride that’s longer than a short dash around the strip malls that surround the’Hood, I can call for an Uber. DAYum! A guy who drives for Uber lives right across the street. Several other Uberites dwell in the immediate neighborhood.

So…umh…WHY am I spending some unholy amount of cash to keep a pile of steel and aluminum sitting in my garage most of the time?

Why am I freakin’ going broke to insure that pile of tinfoil?

For the past couple weeks, the Heap has resided at my son’s house. And…y’know what has happened?

Yeah,

Nothing.

NOTHING horrible has ensued from the absence of a $15,000 pile of sheet metal, bolts, and rubber.

Well. Something HAS happened.

I’ve come to believe that in a city like Phoenix, now that it has installed piles of public transportation up and down almost all of our main drags, there really is NO NEED to own a car! 

Seriously.

From my house, I can walk to not one, not two, but THREE major chain supermarkets: an Albertson’s, an El Rancho, and a Fry’s. Not sufficient? We also have two huge chain drugstores: a Walgreen’s and the one inside the Albertson’s. All these have pharmacies. Three of them sell more groceries than you can dream of.

And with the trains running up and down Main Drag West, I can cruise as far as I please to visit stores, doctors, dentists, and whatnot. For just so much loose change!

Gosh. It’s almost like when we lived in San Francisco: a real city! 

So…I’m thinking get rid of the clunk. Maybe split the sale price with my son, giving half to him as a sales commission. And…call it a day.

We have a rental lot just a couple of blocks up Main Drag west. If I must have a car to drive around, I can go over there and extract one for a day. Same if I feel called to drive up to the Grand Canyon or some such. Why OWN a hole in the ground into which to pour money for the sake of a few rides here and a few rides there?

So…I’m kinda excited about this idea. Haven’t discussed it with M’hijito yet. He being the owner of the male voice here in the famiglia, I think he should have a say in this scheme. But frankly: I suspect he’ll approve. 

A Revelation in Transit

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Y’know… Over the past few days — “weeks,” really, is more like it — a kinda startling revelation has occurred to me. Hang onto your hat, now: What with the proximity of key retail stores, the new lightrail running up and down Conduit of Blight Blvd., and a fleet of shiny new busses, I don’t really need to own a car. 

Oops: should’ve warned you to sit down before reading that…  😀

But seriously…  Without the little catastrophes of the past two or three weeks, this idea would never have entered my fuzzy little mind. BUT…oh, yes, but: the fact is, between the lightrail, the shiny new busses, and the Uber cars swarming all over the neighborhood, I actually may not need to have an expensive pile of metal and glass sitting out in the garage.

Yeah. Seriously!

I can get from Point A to Point B with very little more trouble than it takes to climb in my car and drive between those points.

We have several Uber drivers living here in the’ Hood. They’re delighted to take you wherever you imagine you want to go. And if they’re not available, Phoenix still hosts a fine fleet of standard taxicabs. Call a Yellow Cab and it’ll be at your door in minutes. An Uber driver lives right across the street from me! He can be here in seconds, not minutes.

But…but…what does it take to walk from here to most of the fine emporia where I shop and loaf?

A lightrail line runs across Main Drag North, turns south on Main Drag West, swerves southerly toward Central, goes right past my son’s street, and proceeds to a stop in front of the Beloved AJ’s Grocery Palace.

So…uhm….. {ahem!}

Why on earth would I imagine that I want a car, here in the ‘Hood??

Consider: AJ’s is indeed a drive away. BUT…within a ten-minute walk, we have these fine emporia:

  • Albertson’s: a huge supermarket
  • Sprouts: the beloved hippy-dippy peddler of nominally organic chow
  • Walgreen’s: huge drugstore
  • Bookman’s: bookstore, music, whatnot
  • El Rancho: supermarket
  • Fireworks store (!)
  • Post office
  • Doctor’s office
  • Beauty salon
  • Independent pharmacist
  • Veterinarian
  • Coinstar

And on and on and on… there really is little need to drive anywhere. Certainly not on a regular, day-to-day basis.

Do I need a car to get to the Mayo? Yeah: I wouldn’t want to hire a cab or Uber to schlep halfway to Payson. But I sure don’t go out there often. And for that matter, we’re within walking distance of a major regional hospital…I could extend my little self so radically as to take up with a doctor who practices there. (The one I had there moved to $un ¢ity awhile back, having seen the dollar signs on the wall of the new hospital out there….)

But if you’re considering how much it costs to keep a car — taking into account insurance, regular servicing, repairs, gasoline, parking, and whatnot — the tab for maintenance, repairs, taxes, storage, and the stuff so routine that most of us never even think about it anymore very probably comes to more than it would cost to hire Uber or a taxicab to get around town. A LOT more…

Truth to tell, something over 90 percent of the places I go are within walking distance, or within a reasonably priced cab ride.

And given that amazing little factoid, one could argue — quite reasonably — that a person living in this location really has no need for a car. Especially if that person doesn’t commute to a job.

What the heck: not only that, but walking to the destinations around here comes under the heading of good exercise. When the weather is sane — which, believe it or not, is most of the time — you can walk to any of those places without putting yourself out much.

So…frankly, I’m beginning to think more & more that my son did me a favor by absconding with my car. Who needs it???

Heeee! It keeps getting better…

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Well, by damn! I found a copy of my driver’s license. 

Who would ever have expected such a thing? 😀

So now I don’t have to put up a friend or a taxi driver to schlep me down to the county and wait while I stand in line and I stand in line and I stand in line and I stand in line and I stand in line and I stand in line and ….. Ad effing infinitum. 

Seriously: the lines in that place are freakin’ endless. So this is a big relief.

It brings us back around to the question of whether I’m going to continue to drive the tank at all after this. 

And y’know…hafta tellya the truth: I’m inclined to think not. 

Why should I?

It has become surprisingly easy to get around this city without a car. Not as easy as in San Francisco. But…close.

Add to that the fact that an Uber driver lives right across the street from me! 

Think o’that!

Between Uber and the city’s hugely improved public transit, the truth is…I may not need a car at all. If something comes up that it’s just totally unavoidable, there’s a place a block up the street where I can rent one!

Well. For sure, we’re going to experiment with that thesis. Let’s give it a few weeks to see if I can get around, hassle-free, without owning a tank.

Can you imagine? Not to have to do battle with

* licensing
* maintenance
* gasoline
* keeping the car out of the local thieves’ hands
* storing it in a garage
* pouring money into it
* pouring money into it
* and pouring money into it…

Jeeemineee! This looks like a whole new world! 

Okay, I give up….

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Tooling along halfway through today’s FaM post, when WordPress CRASHED the post. Can’t find it. Can’t reconstruct it.

AAAAARRRGHHHH!

Like we don’t have enough frustration in our ordinary boring lives?

So: toss it all, forget it all, start over from scratch and f*ck it all. Especially the latter. Grrrrrrrrr!

My son having purloined my vehicle, I need to walk through the 100-degree heat to the nearest grocery store to get food and treats for the Queen of the Corgis. Either that or pay an Uber driver to tote me over to the store.

LOL! Speaking of frustration…

It looks like he has also purloined whatever wine or beer remained in the house…though truth to tell, I think the stock has been low or empty for several days. The main issue is dog food. But…we have half-a-dozen cans hiding on the shelf, and about a third of a bag of kibble. So it looks like I can wait until tomorrow morning and hike down to the Albertson’s or the Sprouts to get that stuff, rather than hiring Uber to drive me right this g.d. minute.

As for the beer…meh! That can wait until tomorrow, too. Or until someday.

LOL!

Y’know, this situation gets eye-openinger and eye-openinger. What it reveals, incredibly, that if it were not for the heat, I would not need to own a car at all. 

No kidding! Not to say Can you imagine?

This house is within a few minutes’ walk of two major supermarkets (Albertson’s, Fry’s), a gourmet hippy-dippy store (Sprouts), a community clinic (in the Albertson’s shopping center!), a car rental lot, a computer repair shop, a clothing store, a veterinary, …one can go on and on. Between those and Amazon, there’s really no need to leave the neighborhood, except maybe to make a run on the doctor’s or the dentist’s office…for which you can rent a cab or an Uber. Add to that the train running up and down Main Drag West and the busses on Main Drag West, Main Drag East, Main Drag North, and Main Drag South…and…well…

Seriously: why own a car at all??? 

Think of the sheer volume of cash you could save by using the public transit and the local taxi services…only when you need them? Between the taxes and the upkeep and the fuel, a car really is a hole in the ground into which to pour money. If you organized your local travel needs logically enough, you really would not need to own a vehicle.

And dayum! If the roads here were safe for the purpose, a good bicycle would almost eliminate the need for any gasoline-powered chariot.

Well, of course: they’re not safe for that (or any) purpose. But that notwithstanding, the proximity of so many stores and services here cuts out the need for a good 90% of gasoline-powered transit, here in the ‘Hood.

Seriously: I’m thinking I may not buy another car. And I’m beginning to wonder WHY that hasn’t been obvious to me before now.

Interesting, isn’t it? You get so much in the habit of doing things in thus-and-such an established way, that you don’t think of the alternatives. 

 

Round and Round She Goes…

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And where she stops, nobody cares… 

😀

My son alleges that he managed to get my driver’s license invalidated. Which is to say, it is now illegal for me to drive. (Thus his excuse for hijacking my car, right?)

Well. Ohhhhkayyyy. 

Who can tell us whether that’s true? Who can say whether this little plastic-coated document is good for anything other than decoration?

Well: the Department of Motor Vehicles, of course.

I can’t easily get myself down to DMV in this unholy heat: certainly not without a car of my own to navigate the insane traffic.

Ohhhhkayyyy….

So I got the bright idea to go into a store or business that COULD check whether a document that you use as ID for check-cashing and the like is actually valid. Seems like that oughta work, right?

😀

It gets better and better. 

First store I went into, they didn’t know how to call up your driver’s license and confirm it.

Got that? They were accepting checks, but they didn’t know how to tell whether the checks were valid! Or even whether you’re the person whose name is on the damn check!!

Hmmmmm….

Moving on: Didn’t get much further with the other places in that shopping center.

None of them said my driver’s license was invalid. That was good. I guess.

But none of them could really confirm that my driver’s license could safely be used as ID for check-cashing. Or not. 

Sooooo….. I still don’t know a damn thing. To confirm or deconfirm, somehow I’ll have to get out to the credit union where my banking account resides: on the Arizona State University West Campus, a half-hour drive on the other side of the freeway from here!!

My son has grabbed my car, and so getting over there is darned near impossible. Tomorrow I’ll try calling them on the phone…but doubt that I’ll get far with that.

Otherwise..I’ll either have to hire an Uber to drive me out there and back, or try to mooch a ride with a friend.

{chortle!}

Entertaining as Hell, isn’t it?

Didnja just know Hell is endlessly hilarious?

***

Phoenix is an LA-style city, meaning that you need a car to get around — whether it’s across the city or a few blocks up to the local grocery store.

This, I can cope with by hiring the Uber driver who lives across the street. But really…that IS a PITA, and I’d sure rather not be bothered with it.

***

What if I rent or buy a car, park it in a rented space in a nearby garage (where my kid can’t find it), and go on about my business? Remember: my driver’s license is hidden in my own car, where I normally store it so I don’t have to carry a purse with me everyplace I go. 

Conundrum: That notwithstanding, I haven’t asked whether that license is still valid, or whether the kid has contrived to quash it. To do that, I’ll have to traipse to the DMV office and stand in line till every cow in Arizona comes home. So…it could be that even if I get it back or get another copy, it may be worthless.

LOL! This is getting so ridiculous that even I think it’s kinda funny.

So, y’know what I think is the best thing to do?

Nothing. 

Yeah: nothing. 

Let him keep the damn car. He can pay the insurance and the taxes on it. (These, lemme tellya, are freakin’exorbitant!)

Between Uber, regular taxicabs, and public transit, it’s not that hard to get around this city car-free. In fact, if and when I get the car back, I may sell it: just to be rid of it and all its panorama of expenses. Now that I’ve learned to get around without it, why the hell do I need it?

Ahhhh to be in Berkeley, where you can live comfortably without a car!

No kidding! My great-grandmother and her daughter, my great-aunt, lived on a hillside in Berkeley, about a block below where the train from San Francisco passed through a tunnel into Kensington, the suburb where my cousins lived. But you could clamber up a concrete staircase to the top of that tunnel, where you’d find yourself on the neighborhood street that led to the cousins’ house. Great-Grandmother and Great-Aunt lived in Berkeley for year after year after year…and never owned a car! 

Can you imagine?

Well. You couldn’t do that here; not and retain any grip on your sanity. You’d melt into the pavement. 😀

***

Mumbling on in that precinct: y’know… I suspect it would not cost much more to drive a rental car than it does to own a car and pay the taxes, insurance, and maintenance.

DXH and I did that: he preferred to rent a car rather than own it. Accordingly, for year after year, the car at our house was NOT our car: it belonged to a rental company. If there was a logic behind that preference, I never understood it. Probably it had to do with the fact that he was deducting it from his taxes for his law practice. It was, in theory, a business expense, not a personal vehicle.

I think. But couldn’t swear to that. All I know is that we didn’t actually own the car parked in our driveway.

Sooo…do I need to “actually own” the car parked in my garage? Would it be more advantageous to rent it?

Something to look into.