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There Is a [Pot] House in New Orleans…

…They callllll the Risin’ Sun.
It’s been the ruin
Of many a poor girl,
And Lawd, I know I’m one!

Yup. I’m ruint. No question of it.

Thursday’s gawdawful test for nerve function was nowhere near as gawdawful as I feared. Yes, they do stick electrified needles into your hide. But the things have about the diameter of a hair — you can barely even feel them poking you.

All of which was pretty futile. Well: yes futile, no futile.

We did not come up with a cause of the peripheral neuropathy, the buzzin’ and the tinglin’ in all four paws, enough to make you crave a long dive off the North Rim. But we did rule out some fairly horrifying candidates: the Parkinson’s disease, the Guillain-Barré syndrome…the Lou Gehrig’s disease… at least on a preliminary basis. But here’s a study that indicates the test they did on me — widely known as EMG — does not rule out Guillain-Barré. Indeed, there may be some sporadic evidence of a connection between the Pfizer covid-19 vaccination (which I took a few weeks ago) and the advent of Guillain-Barré. That is what we’d call “a real bad sign.” Also nervous-making: there’s documented evidence of a connection between covid-19 and GBS. Indeed, if I’d read this article a couple months ago, I would have thought twice and thrice about taking that shot.

Meanwhile, in the run-up to this drama, I came across a bunch of research and reports suggesting that one of the most effective remedies known for this ailment is…oh yes…wait for it…yep: cannabis.

Think o’ that…

So my friend VickyC and I got together for lunch and shopping yesterday. VickyC happens to know a surprising amount about pot and the uses thereof. And she has a “medical marijuana” card, a pricey bit of bureaucraciana that allows you to buy dope from local dispensaries. You get this by going to a (heh!) “doctor” who, whether he has an MD or whateverthell, has managed to acquire the documentation to allow him to emit an opinion that yes, yes you DO need the therapeutic wonders of Mary Jane.

One of these happens to reside in the Home Depot shopping center right up the road.

So I call this outfit today. The lady who answers says you don’t need a card to buy “edibles” or to get the stuff to put in a vape pen. Well, VickyC gave me a vape pen yesterday, while we were plotting the destruction of all common decency in the land. And we bought a little bag of 10 “gummies” while we were gadding around the seamier side of town. 😀

I have never, ever done dope in my life (other than the prescriptions various docs have foisted on me). Never has pot passed into my dainty nervous system. But given this current ailment, if the stuff will help, I am sooooo not above it!

These multicolored gumballs contain 150 mcg of THC.

I decide that’s a little much, especially for a first voyage. So last night I cut one in half and ingest that.

The candies that you swallow take 45 to 90 minutes to take effect. And yeah, I’d say it was 30 to 40 minutes before it started to kick in, with a fine sensation of vertigo. Dizzy, as in knocked for a loop…

One pill makes you larger
And one pill makes you small
And the ones that mother gives you
Don’t do anything at all
Go ask Alice
When she’s ten feet tall

Slept until midnight. Woke for about 10 minutes, long enough to grab another aspirin. Uncharacteristically, fell right back to sleep.

Slept until 4:30 a.m. Dropped another aspirin. Fell right back to sleep again. (Usually the pre-dawn wake-up call entails a wait of at least two hours to get back to sleep…though usually “back to sleep” is sometime around 9:00 or 10:00 p.m. that night.)

So in this respect, VickyC was at least partially correct: the stuff does help you to sleep one helluva lot better. Normally I’m lucky to get six hours of sleep, but often have to navigate around on four hours’ worth. Even with interruptions, I’ll take 8 or 10 hours over 4 to 6 hours of sleep, any night!

Awake at 8 a.m. to find the tingling and redness in the palms and feet much reduced.

Decide to try 1/2 gummie to see if the stuff might possibly stave off the PN for the rest of the day. Or even for part of the day, for godsake…

And the answer is, yup, it sure does. But unfortunately it also elicits dizziness and a sense of disorientation. These were tolerable last night, because I was in bed and soon went to sleep. But by light of day: not so tolerable. Walking around the house was so vertiginous that it seemed unsafe. Driving would be totally out of the question. And really, even walking around where there are steps and the like: unwise.

Actually, I’d intended this dose to be 1/4 of a gumdrop but, in my senility, forgot that little vow and gulped down half. So tomorrow morning I’ll have to see if a smaller amount will also keep the buzzing under control, but without making me high.

So there we are. We don’t know what the problem is. But we’ve found something that works  That something is not especially desirable.

But at least it’s…something.

2 thoughts on “There Is a [Pot] House in New Orleans…”

  1. I’ve stopped trying to keep up with blogs so I’m very behind on your recent health challenges. Insomnia…neuropathy…a fractured shoulder…wow, you have had a time of it!! This post managed to work its way into my Facebook feed, though.

    It seems like everyone is promoting CBD or marijuana these days for everything. Well, maybe not everybody, as most of the standard medical professionals I’ve talked with have been rather demure about the claims.

    I’ve had issues with getting a solid night’s sleep for years. Like you, my main issue is waking up after a few hours of sleep and being unable to fall back asleep for several hours. Having to be up at 6 AM most days for work, this was really devastating to my ability to focus and be productive. In my case, it’s been chalked up to anxiety, since usually what happens when I rouse from sleep is my brain kicks in and starts going through the list of things I need to do or was supposed to do and didn’t or worrying about upcoming appointments, etc, etc. So, the psychiatrist I see who helps me with my medications for anxiety and depression prescribed Trazadone to take at night.

    Here we are a few years later and I’m getting some interesting feedback about my sleep patterns from a device I started wearing as part of a medical trial. (It’s an Oura ring, in case you’re curious.) This thing has been amazing to give me insight into why I often feel so tired, despite my diligent use of the Trazadone every night, and my following of most of the advice about good “sleep hygiene.” (Avoiding or minimizing screens before bed, going to bed at the same time every night, etc.)

    Turns out I have been getting very little deep sleep for the entire month that I’ve been wearing this tracker. Apparently adults are supposed to get between 1-1.5 hours of deep sleep every night. That’s the most restorative sleep for muscles, mental activity, etc. Most nights I get less than 12 minutes of deep sleep. Wow!

    After reading this post, I remembered that I had some edible gummies in the house. I’d bought them over a year ago when a friend came for a visit and wanted to make a stop at one of the recreational dispensaries as part of her tourist experience to California. Obviously, I don’t partake of marijuana much if I’ve had these gummies sitting in a drawer for so long. But, I decided to try one last night a couple hours before my normal bedtime.

    Well. For first time since I’ve been wearing this tracker, I got over an hour of deep sleep last night!! I wasn’t restless during the night, either. The only thing that has changed is the inclusion of that one gummy, with 10mg THC. Hmmm….I’m going to try another tonight to see if it will work its magic again, or if that was a fluke.

    I hope you get through this sleep challenge especially very soon. It’s very possible that the lack of true rest and sleep is contributing to your other health issues.

    Reply
    • That is extremely interesting!

      I haven’t worked up the nerve to try a whole chunk of the stuff, for fear I’ll fall over face-forward on the kitchen floor. However, even half a piece of candy — works to keep me asleep most of the night.

      It looks suspiciously as though sporadic and light sleep is typical of older people. It may be normal for those who arrive at the age of full maturity. In fact, there’s a theory that it has an evolutionary purpose.

      Yes. Back in the Day, when our cave-painting ancestors dwelt in the plains and the foothills, younger adults would party into the night (as they do today…), while the grandparent set would tucker out and and turn in earlier in the evening. Then along about 2 to 4 a.m., the well-known internal alarm clock would ring for the old folks, and up they would all pop. They would then linger around the campfire while the younger pups and the children slept, thereby making themselves useful by chasing off any passing cave bears and saber-toothed tigers.

      Makes sense, eh? 😀

      Reply

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