LOL! Check this out:
I finally guzzled down the last of the lifetime supply of bourbon purchased some time back at Costco. Nice bottle…why throw it out? Decided to fill it with Listerine and use it to decorate the bathroom.
Heckuva lot better than this ugly plastic thing sitting on the bathroom counter advertising its glories, eh?
Ill-advisedly, I bought the mint-flavored version of the mouthwash. Don’t like mint—but that was all that Costco carried—and in any event, the mint does nothing to disguise the nasty taste of Listerine. So as soon as I get through the lifetime supply of the blue stuff, I’ll replace it with the regular variety, which looks…alarmingly like bourbon!
{chortle!}
Reminds me of my misspent youth.
Then as now, when I grew up in Saudi Arabia all types of alcohol were strictly contraband. Americans were not allowed to bring their favorite potables out there, and so supposedly the camp was dry.
Supposedly.
In those days, though, Americans still lived up to their reputation for ingenuity. Down at the machine shop, there was a guy who was a real, live Kentucky bootlegger. He built several stills and taught people how to use them. These contraptions would be quietly passed from household to household, where amateur distillers would percolate their own high-test on the kitchen stove.
My father fermented his mash in a big closet in the service porch at the back of our house, using either raisins or orange-juice condensate. The product was clear and, when tested by setting a spoonful alight, burned with a purely invisible flame.
Well, as you can imagine, this booze wasn’t especially tasty. It would be, I suppose, much like high-proof vodka.
Meanwhile, back in New York, the pharmacy at the Barbizon Plaza, where the Company put up its employees when they returned to the States, learned about this burgeoning custom. Some bright fellow had the idea of marketing flavorings for the bootleg grog.
The challenge, of course, was to get them into the country.
Fortunately, the Arabs who manned Customs at Dhahran were a bit naive on this subject. So the pharmacists tricked out a “First Aid Kit” that could be carried through Customs without attracting attention. It contained, in pharmacy bottles, the Eau de Bourbono Cough Medicine, the Crème de Menthe Nose Drops, the Amaretto Headache Tonic, and so on.
Who knows? Maybe one of them was billed as a mouthwash!
All of this is way too funny. When you eventually put the stuff that looks like bourbon into the bourbon bottle, just be careful not to stash that in the liquor cabinet, or someone will be in for a big surprise when they get the next glass 🙂
Heeeeee!
Which reminds me of another story:
Two, three years ago, I’d made some hummingbird food — one part sugar to three parts water. A fair amount was left over and so I stashed it in the fridge to refill the feeders when they ran out.
A few days later, I had a party. SDXB was here along with a bunch of other friends. When La Maya asked for a glass of water, he (who does not use ice but instead keeps bottles of tap water in his refrigerator) dutifully trotted into the kitchen and served her up a large, cold glassful.
Poor woman almost gagged. 😀
That’s so funny. Good thing you guys didn’t get caught. Which girl is you in the photo?
@ Stephen: Occasionally the Saudis would threaten to nab people for one misdemeanor or another. But Standard Oil and British Petroleum were cranking SO much money for the crown that nothing much ever came of it.
I was never as pretty as either of those little girls.