Coffee heat rising

Never Rains but It Pours…

Lightning_strike_jan_2007😀 Literally! Along about 2:15 this morning, the dogs and I were lifted off the bed by the C-R-A-A-A-A-C-K kerBLAAAAAM of a lightning strike that sounded like it hit right outside the window.

The puppy was totally terrorized. I had to restrain her from leaping off the bed, which is one of those extra-deep things that you practically need a ladder to climb into. Cassie didn’t like it either.

The storm continued to grow, the thunder rolling in, most of the time, about four to six seconds after the flash — suggesting most of the storm was up around North Mountain. But three more blasts were very close, indeed.

Cassie decided dogscretion was the better part of valor and moved from her normal position at the foot of the bed up to the pillows, bringing her dog hair with her. Thank you very much. This was after Ruby concluded that the appropriate response to the commotion was to growl. Extensively. No amount of assuring her that everything was allll riiighhttt persuaded her to quit growling.

Oh well. Eventually the storm blew away and sleep (after a fashion) returned.

Meanwhile, the amount of work that has poured in would, on its own, submerge Louisiana. Yesterday I sent off the last of a 100-page dissertation written in Chinglish, most of which entailed variance analysis. That was a challenge.

But mercifully, it was an interesting challenge. The author’s project actually had some meaning — unlike about 90% of Ph.D. theses and dissertations — and although the standard dissertation format instills a great deal of redundancy, as it developed she’d come up with something that may have some practical use.

Now it’s back to the other project, an amateur novel. Although the content is a great deal more comprehensible, it’s probably harder to edit, because it entails having to…well…what can one say? To tutor the author in the basic skills of writing fiction. And that, my friends, ain’t easy.

A-n-n-d this morning what should come in but an inquiry for an indexing project!

Hallelujah, brothers and sisters. At this rate, The Copyeditor’s Desk will stay afloat long enough to see the New Year. Get out the oars and row!

The Next Big Project: A New Writing Book

So I propose to a new young editor at Columbia, a pup who doesn’t know me from Adam’s Off Ox (what’s an off ox, anyway?), that we should do a new edition of The Essential Feature. He gives me a brush-off. I think, eff you, you little twit, and lay a new set of plans.

This effing of him comes easily, because in the meantime some other plans are afoot. Pretty clearly I need to get off my duff, abandon the evidently futile social media, and show up in front of living human beings to peddle my bookish wares.

And what, yea verily what do I have to sell? As Jackie wrestles with masses of content at Plain & Simple Press, we realize that of several content categories, “writing tips” is a) the largest and b) the most appealing on social media.

By extension, I conclude, the large “writing tips” category of my blog and print content probably represents a convenient shoehorn into various public speaking opportunities.

One plan is to try to offer a public-service course for one or more of the community colleges — how to self-publish your own book. Something along those lines could also be offered at the local bookstores, which tend to offer various presentations, and quite frankly I’m very sure I can find venues coming out the wazoo without much effort.

And what do we need to embellish these dog-and-pony shows?

Why…another book, of course!

Come to think of it, I realized that between the more timeless segments of the Columbia book, two yakkity blogs, and lecture material for five courses, there’s plenty of material to cobble together a book about how to write, self-edit, and self-publish your own magnum opus. Yes. You, too, boys and girls, can publish your very own Great Novel (or Great Self-Help) (or Great Memoir)  (or Great Exposé) of the Western World.

Thanks to the “filter” function in WordPress, it didn’t take long to cobble together the skeleton of this thing. A few more hours and it was fleshed out, to the tune of about 85,000 words.

By the time the chaff is trimmed out, it should come to about 60,000 or 70,000 words, a good length for a nonfiction tome like this. I’ve been pouring the candidate material into one of Friedman’s Word book templates…am about 3/4 of the way done at about 43,000 words: 267 pages (so far) in a standard trade-book trim size.

Naturally, after weeks of nothin’ doin’, a new client shows up at the door, smack in the middle of this industrious little project.

He has 26 pages of abstruse academic copy written in, by his admission, darkest Chinglish. Needs it by the 29th. Just now in China it happens to be the 26th. He’s not paying much, but that’s OK: every little bit helps.

So tomorrow &  the next day will be occupied by that project. Good. Which reminds me…my other honored Chinese client owes me a grand. Guess we’ll be importuning her before we start on this guy’s project.

🙂

Slogging Along…

Still buried in work! Was set to spend the day slogging through the rest of the Semiramis index (i hoped…) when the current Chinese Graduate Student send another iteration of her last chapter, slashed and burned by her dissertation director and reconstituted by her.

Rereading and updating edits on that consumed half the day.

So for the second day in a row (day before yesterday most of the hours were consumed by a client’s book formatting issues), I came back to the mind-numbing index job so tired I could hardly hold my head up. Keyboarded entries from a few marked-up pages (decided to dispense with the notecard technique, since this is already such a large and time-consuming job) and then crawled into bed around 10 p.m.

This morning I’m supposed to go out with a friend to breakfast/lunch (depending on when she gets away from her client). Then fly to south Phoenix to pick up page proofs of the client’s book and fly back up to Richistan to deliver them to the guy. Then fly home and get back to work on the index.

Really, I should farm this index out. But I need the money and don’t want to share just now.

Interesting news on the Hypochondria Front: since I have to submit to a major fishing expedition check-up in order to stay on the rolls at the Mayo, and since I’m supposed to revisit the cardiologist in another month, I decided to revisit the blood pressure issue. CardioDoc suggested keeping a running record of twice-daily readings for a period — when we were trying to shake off the hysteria engendered by the quack Young Dr. Kildare sent me to, he asked me to do that for six months, after which he declared me free of high blood pressure and probably free of any cardio-vascular problems.

Well, I hate taking my blood pressure — the act itself seems to drive up the numbers — so decided to limit that exercise to a week or ten days. But it seemed like it would be good to have a running record, because just walking into the Mayo (or any other medical facility or doctor’s office) pushes my blood pressure up. Way up. I’d like to have a little chart I can show this new doctor to fend off a new effort to put me on some not-so-benign med for the rest of my life.

Amazingly, despite the eight or ten pounds of overweight I’ve put on since the start of the bellyache problem and despite the endless, stress-inducing workload, the BP readings are well within the normal range: 116/72 this morning, after fiddling with the computer, feeding the dogs, and puttering around the house.

So that was a pleasant surprise.

Along those lines, I made another surprising discovery. In an idle moment while taking a break from the grind, I happened to google my father’s name. Discovered his brother is buried in Tarrant County, Texas, whence they came and where he returned after my aunt died. (He had moved to Sun City because my father retired there).

Turns out he remarried after moving back home in his old age. The new bride lived about ten years after they wed, and he outlived her another ten years. I had no idea!

My uncle lived to be eighty-nine. My father had told me he was 84 , and that his other brother had also died at 84. The only reason this uncle died was that he fell off a chair he’d climbed on to change a light bulb. He broke his hip and died of the ensuing shock.

If that hadn’t happened to him, he presumably would have lived into his 90s.

My father died at 84. The big difference between the two of them, besides the fact that my father worked on ships and my uncle had a quiet managerial job at a dairy, was that the uncle never smoked nor drank. My father smoked — and more to the point, lived with a woman who was smoking six packs a day at the end of her life — and he also had a drink or two almost every day.

At Find-a-Grave, I may have tracked down the third brother. If the record I found is his, then he lived to age 82. I believe he was a pretty tough character — a cowboy and eventually a ranch foreman. My father disliked him, and I knew almost nothing about him. The man I found in those records was married, briefly, to a woman who had a new last name by the time she died, and he is listed has having a son, born in the 1930s, who used his mother’s last name, acquired after his birth. So presumably they divorced early on, and it appears that this uncle never remarried.

At any rate, given that on my mother’s side, the women who evaded the family disease (cancer) lived into their mid-90s without ever seeing a doctor (they were Christian Scientists), it appears I have some pretty good genes in the offing. I may make into the 90s, too, barring a successful effort by one of my fellow homicidal drivers. 😀

Otherwise: all quiet on the Western front. It’s getting warm enough to swim, despite some unseasonably cool days. That would be nice, if I could find some time to do so.