You’ve gotta see this one to believe it. Truly, only in Arizona could a candidate for public office bear such an apt name…and have the effrontery to run with such frank (heh) honesty about the character of our fine leadership.
At first I thought this was a joke when my friend from Massachusetts sent it over. Educated Easterners tend to think all things associated with the State of Arizona are a joke.
Googled the guy. Yep: he shows up in a New Times article. But New Times is an alternative weekly, one that’s occasionally given to sleaze and often given to irony. The article itself could be a joke. Though it wasn’t dated April 1, we still have to classify it as dubious.
An article in the East Valley Tribune suggests there really is such a person, and that in the past he has, shall we say, exaggerated his role in the installation of rubberized asphalt on the Valley’s fine freeways. On the other hand, no daily papers in the state are great, and the Trib is one of the lesser stars in a dim constellation. Still dubious.
But then we have this. Holy sh!t.
There IS a Frank Schmuck, and he has run for public office before. The Tucson Citizen, which in 2008 was a halfway decent newspaper, reports that the Citizens Clean Elections Commission was investigating the guy for complaints that he violated the Clean Elections Law, failed to report expenses for a fundraiser, failed to report vendors providing services, and exceeded the maximum amount for early contributions from supporters.
Yup. The man is ideal for the Arizona State Legislature. Li’l Abner’s ideel representative.
Check out the disclaimer at the bottom of the guy’s page:
Paid for by Team Schmuck. Use of Military Rank, Job Titles, or Photographs in Uniform Does Not Imply The Endorsement of The Department of Defense.
Probably the Fourth of July is not the best time for a candidate to assure us that he doesn’t endorse the Department of Defense.
On the other hand, it does brand him as a member of Arizona’s ill-educated Good Ole Boys Club, whose members are graduates of a public school system that consistently ranks among the nation’s bottommost three. In this state, not understanding the difference between “of the Department of Defense” and “by the Department of Defense” — or how to use capitalization in title case — is actually a qualification for public office.
😀