Coffee heat rising

Making $7,390 stretch for a year…and living decently

Okay, so just now $7,390 is left of the $28,000 of layoff savings that I entered unemployment with 18 months ago. This little stash, which I found sitting in my various bank accounts as my fine former job wound to a close, has been supporting me, along with Social Security and the irregular pittance I earn as an adjunct professor of English, while I try to delay having to draw down my IRA and brokerage accounts.

It’s lasted longer than anyone thought it would, and with any luck at all, it’s about to last another year.

The other day I revisited my ultracomplicated cash flow scheme, largely because I need to find a way to extract more monthly spending money from this Pushmi-Pullyu. The truth is, I’m not giving myself enough to live on comfortably. It was tight when I started a year and a half ago, but the increases in food and fuel costs (not inflation, right?), along with a never-ending slew of unplanned expenses, lately have made it impossible to stay on budget. I’ve been allocating $800 for discretionary expenses (a total of $2050 a month for all expenses, discretionary and fixed), when the fact is I really need something more like $1,500, for a total of around $2,750.

Unless a miracle happens (for example, I land that one-year-only job or, more likely, win the lottery), not only am I never going to earn any more than the $19,200 I’m making this year, my earned income actually is going to drop $2,400, because of the recently announced tightening of the noose around the adjuncts’ necks.

That means, I guess, the allocation from this serendipitous little “survival fund” will have to be adjusted.

Also, I’d like to simplify my bookkeeping.

What I have been doing is when money comes in, I transfer some of it to the joint account from which M’hijito and I pay the mortgage on the submerged house, transfer some of it to a self-escrow account for paying insurance and tax bills, transfer some into a short-term emergency and diddle-it-away fund, keep some of it in my checking account, and transfer $1060 from the survival fund to make up the shortfall between income and outgo. This complex shuffle no longer suffices to cover expenses. Way complicated!

So, I’ve cooked up something slightly different. In some ways, it’s six of one, half-a-dozen of the other (or, could we say, robbing Peter to pay Paul?). But it’ll give me a little bit more money—raising the discretionary budget to about $1,100 most (but not all) months—and the process will be simpler. I can’t afford the amount I actually need, but even a little increase will help.

Instead of moving money from Survival Savings to checking in amounts that supplement Social Security and teaching  pay, I’m going to go the other way around: move every penny of income—Social Security, teaching, bank heists, windfalls—from checking to Survival Savings. Then, once a month, I’ll pay myself $2,300. If any cash is left from the previous month’s budget, I’ll just “top up” the checking account to reach a base figure of $2,300.

This gives me a raise of about $250 a month, which I hope will cover the increase in routine expenses.

The problem with figuring out whether this will work and what it will do to the Survival Fund’s longevity is the extreme irregularity and unpredictability of adjunct income. From pay period to pay period, I rarely know what my check is going to hold. One week I can get $300, and two weeks later it’ll be $800 or $1,000, with no clear rhyme nor reason. HR seems not to know how to figure out what one will be paid, and not being an accountant, I can’t even make an educated guess. All I know is that during the summer when I most need extra money, my teaching pay drops into the basement, and during the month between fall and spring semesters I get nothing.

The only way to project the effectiveness of this scheme—and the length of time the Survival Fund will last—is to enter 2010-11 pay amounts into a spreadsheet showing how the new transfer scheme will work.

The upshot is surprisingly positive. Well…all things considered. Transfers into and out of Survival Savings  look like this:

If my amazingly tedious calculations are correct, Survival Savings will run out in August 2012. At that time, I’ll have to cash in a whole life policy; the post-tax balance from that will probably stretch another year or 18 months. After that…well, let’s hope the stock market is doing OK, because at that point I’ll have to start drawing down investments.

During the winter break and the month or so of summer that I’ll have no income, I’ll have to drop my living-expenses budget back to its present level, $2,090. This will be difficult next summer, because utilities are so high during the heat and because, as we’ve observed for the second summer running, everything goes wrong when you can least afford it. However…that comes under the heading of tough nougies.

If all this comes to pass as estimated (a very big If, indeed), then I should be able to live adequately and pay my share of the mortgage without exhausting Survival Savings until a year from this August. Might even be able to stretch it out for another month or two, if I can keep expenses significantly under $2,300 for several of the cooler months. That’s not unreasonable; when nondiscretionary bills are at their lowest, I can have a surplus of $300 or $400. Four of those would keep that $7,390 grubstake going through September.

Obviously, I’m not thrilled at the precariousness of this system. On the other hand… I feel like it’s really not too bad. If in fact the insurance payout will last another 18 months or so, then I will have succeeded in pushing back the time I’ll have to draw down investments for four years after Canning Day.

Those investments have about recovered their former, pre-Crash glory. Assuming our esteemed leaders don’t bring on another market crash with their grandstanding shenanigans, a 4 or 5 percent drawdown plus Social Security (assuming, again, that it still exists in 2013 or so) should cover my expenses and pay the mortgage—without benefit of flakey part-time teaching income.

The Weirdness That Is Adsense

I enjoy exploring the mazes of Google Adsense’s labyrinthine reports and policies. Adsense has been phasing in a new reporting system, which provides a lot more information than the older system did—or at least, it provides it more accessibly. It’s full of curiosities.

Every now and again, you’ll see things in it that are truly mysterious.

One of the things they can do now is to identify the type of computer that was used to access a page. If you select “Performance Reports” and then click on “Platforms,” Google can actually tell you how many views of your site were made by people with desktops, mobile devices, etc. This amazes me (also creeps me out a bit: who needs Google spying on you in quite that much detail?).

Over the past week, for example, FaM readers viewed 563 of Funny’s pages with “high-end mobile devices.” Some of them apparently clicked on ads, since they generated a couple of bucks this week. The first time I discovered this Adsense Reports blandishment, a few people had been accessing the site through their mobile gadgets, but none of them were rising to any advertiser’s bait. Now, though, apparently some of them are biting.

Meanwhile, 5,005 pages were viewed from desktops. Unclear whether a “high-end mobile device” can be a laptop, or whether “desktop” = a big clunker on your desk or something like a MacBook, which today has more power and speed than my immobile iMac.

Equally unclear what is meant by “unmatched ad requests,” a line that appears on the “Platform” page. Whatever it is, it can’t be very significant: it always registers “0.”

Adsense kindly includes a sort of glossary with its reports page—it’s really an agglomeration of FAQs, I think. Look up “unmatched ad request” and you get the answer to some customer’s question about why this item appears in his reports:

An ad request is counted each time your site requests an ad to be served, even if no ad is returned. Unless your coverage is 100%, you will have more ad requests than matched requests (ads that are returned and displayed on your site), resulting in some unmatched requests.

Some reports have columns that are meaningful only for matched requests. For example, the Targeting type report shows how ads displayed on your site have been targeted. When an ad request is unmatched, there are no ads to consider, so the request has no targeting type. This is why unmatched requests appear in a separate row.

Uhm…yeah. Doesn’t that just clear everything up for you?

Oh well.

Moving on, the Biggest Mystery of Adsense—at least for my feeble little brain—is why some days and some weeks vast lucre (oh, say, $1.95 a day!) comes pouring in, and at other times pay is in pennies. The past two or three weeks, FaM has been cranking more pennies than usual (??? in the dead of summer when readers should be vacationing at the beach?????). But last month it didn’t earn enough to get Adsense off its duff to send a payment. I can’t for the life of me figure out what I’m doing (if I’m doing anything) to cause Adsense revenues to increase in some weeks and flatten out in others.

It does seem as though spikes in revenues may increase when you discuss certain topics. For example, the current increase seems to have occurred around the time I was holding forth about credit cards. A bunch of ads for banks, credit cards, loan sharks, and the like came up (at least, they did on my computer—apparently these things are tailored according to what Google can see of your browsing habits as it spies on you). Maybe ads from well-heeled institutions pay better…i.e., maybe Google charges ING more than it charges some local air-conditioning or pool company and then passes a few pennies of the profit along to the site publisher???

LOL! That would explain why some bloggers create whole sites devoted to nothing but discussing credit cards. 😀 Boooooring, but profitable.

Adsense has performed moderately well over the past week. Not well enough to retire to the Côte d’Azur, by any means, but well enough that if I could be certain it would behave this way all the time, the S-corporation that receives the vast lucre could afford to buy me a cell phone.

{sigh} But I’m afraid it’s just like adjunct teaching: catch as catch can.

 

 

Pupple!

M’hijito sends a photo of his Intended Puppy, below.

{click to enlarge}

Ain’t he cute? He comes home to M’hijito’s house next weekend.

Back online…sort of

Ooof! Overworked into near silence for the past few days. And incredibly tired: no sleep, to speak of, all week long.

Tuesday an old friend who had dropped off the face of the earth called. It develops that the reason she faded from the scene had to do with some very serious trouble her adult son managed to get himself into, of a truly crushing nature. She’s been trying to cope with that since last November. Now that he’s on his way to the slam, I guess she hopes to reconnect with the world. Heartbreaking…I lay awake most of that night thinking on how devastated she must be.

But otherwise, the workload has been ever so slightly astonishing, so I’ve been working into the wee hours almost every night anyway.

Yesterday it looked like I would finally get a break. I figured if I could just keep plugging away into the evening, I’d get through the last of my share of the stoont papers, and then I’d have THREE FULL DAYS free of drudgery! No class today—Friday—a whole day to myself. Tomorrow my friend KJG, her daughter, and I are meeting mid-town for lunch and then an afternoon concert. And Sunday: all mine.

Or so I thought.

I did get through the papers. But…when I got home from campus, there on the server was a message from my erstwhile client, wanting me to read more copy and get it back by Monday.

Buh-bye, weekend!

And the electrician called back saying he wants to show up to do the repairs on the ominous light switch this morning. So don’t leave town…

These developments required that all the backed-up chores awaiting the first day of the new budget cycle (which was yesterday) had to be done on the way home from campus, pushing bed-time back by the same number of hours that the errands kept me from work.

Among other things, I finally schlepped Harvey back to Leslie’s to be repaired: $80. He’s working again, though, and after a brief wrestle with a pile of beans and strangling leaves from the devil-pod tree, I dropped him back in the water and watched him vacuum up the dirt from the last dust storm. (Yes. We had another one. No where near as dramatic as the one that made national news, but messy.)

The electrician’s visit will probably run another $80. And a notice came in the mail that the car has to have another pointless emissions test and then I have to cough up this year’s registration rip-off. That will run around $100 to $150.

So much mud from the dust storms has accreted in the pool’s DE filter that I’ll have to get the service man back here to take it apart and clean it out again—very prematurely. He was just here a couple of months ago. That’s a $150 job that ordinarily doesn’t have to be done more than once or twice a year.

So. Here we are in the second day of the flicking budget cycle, and I’ve already spent more than I can afford! Two days in, and I’m already dipping into emergency savings to cover the July/August bills.

If these costs had happened in the winter—anytime between November and March or April—I could have afforded them. But not. flicking. NOW!

At any rate, I won’t have time to contemplate that over the weekend (or to clean my filthy house or tend to the bedraggled garden or wash and vacuum the car or puppy-proof the house or track down new puppy stuff on Craig’s List or make a puppy mattress or clean out the storage shed and garden shelves or sit down with my feet up or to read something that I’d like to read) because I’ll be editing copy, a job that quickly expands to fill all available moments.

Oh well.

Likely won’t be posting over the weekend, either. There won’t be enough hours in the days for that.

So, by way of keeping ourselves entertained here in the blogosphere, let’s get a little help from our friends:

Have you been following Frugal Scholar’s adventures in France? She’s been posting off and on as she and Mr. FS enjoy their time there, and it’s been really interesting. Check out today’s rumination on shopping (or the freedom therefrom) and then, if you’re not an FS regular, scroll back through the past few weeks’ posts. Lots of fresh and interesting stuff there.

Revanche has been posting regularly about Doggle. She and PiC jumped off the financial cliff and purchased a Dog Chariot ( 🙂 !), but that’s far from the last of the story. LOL! Looks to me like this hound is what SDXB liked to call Anna the Ger-Shep: a thousand-dollar-a-day dog!

Wandered over to Nicole and Maggie’s place yesterday, while idling time between classes, and came across a call for advice on whether they should monetize Grumpy Rumblings of the Untenured.

While perusing the comments there, I came across a cool site by one of N&M’s readers, Clarissa’s Blog. The proprietor of that worthy space offers a lead to her post on an affiliate program called SkimLinks, which looks pretty interesting. In passing, I looked up reviews of SkimLinks and didn’t see much that was negative; this could be worth looking into.

Speaking of the which—quitting the day job to retire on the untold riches pouring in from your Internet business, that is—SVB recently held forth again on that subject. Check out her interesting advice, based on personal experience, on trading the day job for a flexible work schedule.

And speaking of time, apparently some people get some of it to take off and do their own thing. Money Beagle advises on how to enjoy your time off without feeling guilty. 🙂

Budgeting in the Fun Stuff is now a free woman! She’s finally sprung the shackles of the daily grind and taken off into self-employment. This has been a long-standing goal for her. Congratulations, BiFS!

101 Centavos weighs in on the national debt issue with a solidly written discussion of the general hysteria, of the facts, and of the comparative positions of the U.S. vis-á-vis several European nations.

Over at My Journey to Millions, Evan, thinking to some degree along the same lines as Centavos’s (i.e., that managing a family budget is similar to running a government), asks readers if they would ever go past their own debt limits, and under what circumstances.

And speaking of debt, Mrs. Accountability at Out of Debt Again reports that Mr. A’s business is picking up, and that recently they’ve managed to knock down their debt by almost a thousand bucks.

At Surviving and Thriving, Donna Freedman takes on the sticky question of whether and how much you should help family members, a perennial favorite among PF readers.

Welp, I’ve gotta get to work. Later!

 

These People Would Lead America?

News report:

WASHINGTON (AP) — A Republican congressman from Florida turned to email on Tuesday to call a Democratic colleague from the state “vile, despicable and cowardly” after she called into question his stance on Medicare during the debate over a spending cap and balanced budget bill before the House.

Rep. Allen West, a first-term Republican from south Florida, wasn’t shy about his online outburst. He sent his peppery email to numerous lawmakers as well as his target, Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz, D-Fla., the chairwoman of the Democratic National Committee.

The subject line of the email: “Unprofessional and Inappropriate Sophomoric Behavior from Wasserman Schultz.”

The e-mail said: “Look, Debbie, I understand that after I departed the House floor you directed your floor speech comments directly towards me. Let me make myself perfectly clear, you want a personal fight, I am happy to oblige. You are the most vile, unprofessional and despicable member of the US House of Representatives. If you have something to say to me, stop being a coward and say it to my face, otherwise, shut the heck up.”

Associated Press
July 19, 2011

And what did the virago say that triggered this spray of rabid slaver?

About West’s support of the Republicans’ “Cut, Cap, and Balance” plan, she observed, “The gentleman from Florida, who represents thousands of Medicare beneficiaries, as do I, is supportive of this plan that would increase costs for Medicare beneficiaries. Unbelievable from a member from south Florida.”

And there we have it. This is what’s wrong with the extreme right wing of the Republican party: they are not leaders.

It’s hard to say what they are (at least, while remaining more or less polite). But leaders, they are not.

A personal attack in place of a reasoned argument on issues is what we call an ad hominem fallacy. It is a flaw in logical thinking. It is not leadership.

Unleashing language like “vile, despicable and cowardly” is the abusive behavior of a bully. It is not leadership.

Demanding that a person who disagrees with you, however blandly, sit down and shut up is hectoring and bullying. It is not leadership.

Have Americans become so inured to the loud-mouthed meanness that substitutes for discourse on national talk radio that we actually think this is discourse? It’s not.

It’s a lot of things. It’s rude. It’s stupid. It’s ignorant. It’s vile. It’s unprofessional. It’s despicable. It’s vicious. It’s shallow. But it’s not discourse.

It’s meanness. It’s bullying. It’s intimidation. But it’s not leadership.