Funny about Money

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. ―Edmund Burke

Work Avoidance: A Salable Skill?

😀 If Work Avoidance is a salable skill, I should be able to make a pretty good living at it. I am becoming very accomplished at it.

So far I have managed NOT to…

…dork around with attaching the expensive new external hard drive to the Macbook; and therefore not to…
…back up the Macbook to Time Machine…
…clean the pool…
…clean the bathrooms…
…call the vet about racking up yet another fat bill to check both dogs for UTIs…
…sneak out the door with Ruby and walk her for the requisite mile…
…clean the mud up off the floor…
…write a single word of Ella’s Story
…repair the bathroom rug that fell apart…
…paint the chipped area on the archway between the living room and the hallway

I have, however, spent a great deal of time and labor cleaning up dog piss. Just threw down a new dog pee mat, purchased this ayem at Walmart. Within five minutes, Cassie missed it. So once again had to get down on hands and knees, scrub up the mess, and scald the skin on my hands with disinfectant. Wheee!

Yes. By way of acquiring another bag of 30 pee-pads, it was off to the local Walmart this morning, up on Gangbanger’s Way, oddly enough the only grocery store in the ’hood where I feel safe walking across the parking lot. This, thanks to the flamboyant presence of a crew of security guards. One of them actually said good morning to me today, albeit whilst eying me suspiciously. He was busy snapping photos of some worthy’s car on his cell phone. Hm.

Walmart. The home of My Kinda People. Got in line behind a Latina woman who was straight out of a Diego Rivera painting. She was truly beautiful, with her long, loosely braided and radiantly black hair and her sturdy working-class air. And she had the single cutest baby you’ve ever seen in your life, perched in the shopping cart’s child seat. He was a sleepy little kid — must have been his nap-time — yet unsmilingly patient. And quietly interested in the passers-by, some of whom would catch his attention and, for reasons unknowable, induce him to track them across the store with his eyes.

To my great delight, Walmart had boxes of Constant Comment tea bags.

How did I know? 😀 Let me count the ways…

My mother was very fond of Constant Comment, which she loved using to make Arizona tea (known in cooler climes as “sun tea”). And, objectively speaking, the stuff really is superior for that purpose.

On a wet and rainy day, too — the sort of wet, muddy, rainy days we’ve been having this week — Constant Comment served hot makes a great cuppa.

So, how did I know Walmart surely must carry Constant Comment, when more noble venues such as the local Safeway/Albertson’s, Sprouts, Fry’s Richistan, and waypoints more upscale most certainly do not?

Combat experience in the class wars.

After I married into the striving Young Professional class — this would be the Junior League and the Phoenix Country Club set — I was surprised to learn (by way of a sharp rebuke) that Constant Comment is considered deeply déclassé.

Yes. The stuff is regarded by the wealthy and the would-be wealthy as swill for the lower classes. We do not drink that, dear. We do not even recognize its presence on the grocery store shelf, if we are ever unfortunate enough to find ourselves in a grocery store that carries such a thing.

No kidding. Some society wives actually instructed me, peering down their patrician noses, on the low-brow aspects of my favorite exotically flavored tea.

Ohhh well. Now that I’m old and poor again, I guess I can drink any damn tea I like.

She feeds you tea and oranges…

Author: funny

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4 Comments

  1. Might want to check out the pricing at Petco on “pee pads” . When our Dear Mother Cat was failing it became necessary to purchase the “pads” in “bulk” … 200 count. They “price matched” and it was a lot cheaper and easier….At her peak…DMC would have went thru 30 pads in about 3 -4 days…. You are a good owner!

    • Yeah, Petco is definitely cheaper. However, the Petco pads seem to be much smaller. For $53 you can get 200 puppy pee pads, but they’re only 22×23 inches. Walmart’s human pee pads for the mattress are $15 for 30, but the things are 30×36 inches. I use two of the things to create a space big enough for Cassie to use comfortably. If my (highly questionable) arithmetic is right, it would take three Petco pads to cover the same area as two Walmart pads, so that would cut into the savings.

      Also, Petco is a bit of drive: across the freeway and yet another journey through a sketchy neighborhood. The Walmart, while not in the world’s greatest garden spot, either, at least is just around the corner. And I can get other things there in a single trip: today I grabbed a yam to add to this week’s dog food recipe and that box of Constant Comment teabags. Given my affection for driving in Phoenix’s homicidal traffic, being able to get everything in one stop is worth something.

      And I do have to say: those security guard dudes ARE worth something, too: a trip to that Petco is going to entail, about 6 times out of 10, having to repel yet another damned panhandler. I haven’t been harassed in the Walmart parking lot since they began hiring the security guys.

  2. DH and I are experienced work avoiders. We call it “retirement.” I would put a cute, smiley symbol here , but I’m avoiding learning how. Enjoy your blog.