Coffee heat rising

Spring II y’cumin’ in!

What a beautiful morning. About 80 when the dogs turned me out of the sack, and it’s still lovely and cool outside.

Arizona has two springs: one about March & April and another come September. Plants are reviving and springing back into bloom already, in anticipation of the second spring. We’ll have one or two more blasts of heat, and then it will be gorgeous for the rest of the fall and winter.

The Texas sage by the pool is in an ecstasy. So are the wild honeybees that feed on it.

TexasSagePoolsideThis is the plant that used to arch over the water, which I love because when the helicopter bastards fly over while I’m in the pool, I can swim in underneath it so they can’t eyeball me. One of the workmen decided NOTHING would do but what it had to be cut back, though, so he hacked off the sprays that bent over the edge and sometimes dipped into the water.

Men. You simply can NOT make them listen to the female voice.

TexasSageUnderneathOh well. It’ll grow back. It still makes a little bit of a grotto: very beautiful from the deep end.

Meanwhile, the orange-variety of yellowbell (I forget what the thing is called) is also blooming, which is kind of a surprise.

YellowBellOrangeSo it goes.

Two large projects came in the door yesterday — as usual, it never rains but it pours. One is due in seven days — 100 pages of academic Chinglish, fortunately on a pretty interesting topic. So there won’t be much time for blogging.

Forget me not!

 

Counter Oven Update

Faster than a speeding baby, this will have to be: forgot I had a dentist’s appointment at 10 a.m., which is going to distort all my plans to spend the whole day cooking and shopping and cooking. And then cooking some more.

So I got the Breville model after all, since reviews are marginally better and I’d rather do business with Williams-Sonoma, as huge mega-corps go, than with Macy’s, where the hired help can’t pull themselves away from their personal conversations with their friends to condescend to wait on the (rare!) customer.

It’s much smaller than I expected, though it certainly will hold a small baking pan and one or two bread pans. Most bakeable things, though, can go in the grill, so that comes under the heading of “Nonproblem.”

Interestingly, though, it’s also much lighter than I expected! It doesn’t weigh anything like the slow-cooker, for example. That means there’s really no reason to park it in the garage and leave it there. I think it will camp out in the garage when it’s not in use, but when I need it, I’ll set it on the kitchen counter, whereinat…

a) it will have tile underneath it, reducing the fire hazard factor;
b) there’s already a smoke alarm nearby, so I won’t have to install a new one;
c) I can keep an eye on it at all times; and
d) the fire extinguisher in the kitchen is newer and fresher than the one in the garage.

Today: Prepare the eggplant lasagne; dry the remaining eggplant (which is salted and sweating as we scribble and chopped in chunks for ratatouille), package it, and stash it in the fridge. RUN to the dentist, remembering to drag an empty propane tank with me. Fly away from the dentist; stop by Sprouts to pick up another couple of onions and some zucch’s to complete provisioning for the ratatouille. Race up to the U-Haul to refill the spare propane tank. Put two large pans of eggplant lasagne to bake in the grill. Start cooking the ratatouille. If it’ll fit, put ratatouille in the new countertop oven. If not, finish it in the grill whenever the lasagne is cooked. Cool the lasagne; cut it into meal-sized chunks and freeze. Save some of it for dinner and to feed my son when he gets in from Colorado tomorrow night.

Use remaining FREAKING BUSHEL of tiny sweet peppers to make an improvised cream of sweet pepper soup. I think this stuff is going to defy belief in the deliciousness department. At least…I hope so. 🙂

Slice and pickle some of the cukes. Use remaining cukes to prepare a lifetime supply of xergis (cold cucumber soup — unbelievably good to eat and a real treat in this weather).

Review and comment upon prospective client’s copy.

Feed dogs. Wring dogs out. Fall into the sack.

And so…up, up, and AWAYYYY!

Live-Blogging from the Lake

Yeah. The back porch is a lake. 🙂

LakePatioLake Patio, we call it.

It’s high rush hour. The I-17 is closed in both directions. Water is still pouring out of the sky.

As the clouds gathered — they looked like nuclear bomb mushrooms along about 1:30 in the afternoon — and later in the day the sky darkened, for a few minutes I thought we might be looking at a potential tornado.

But no. I think this is just a routine freshet.

So far, we haven’t lost power. That’s nice, but the world wouldn’t end: exterior temp has dropped to a highly tolerable 80 degrees.

The main issue is the toilette facilities for the dogs. Ruby tried to go out the doggy door and found herself up to her little hocks in water.

The side yard’s not flooded, but whether they’ll go out there remains to be seen. Dogs, like humans, are hopeless creatures of habit.

My poor son had to drive home in this — assuming he didn’t have the sense or the inclination to stay at the office till the storm passed. If he left even a few minutes early, he wouldn’t have realized the storm cell was this far north and west: by 5 p.m. the local Play-Nooz was showing it in the east and east-central part of the city.

First day of art class today! Personally, I didn’t do well: not feeling very well. Haven’t had a decent night’s sleep in weeks.

Last night I reluctantly dropped a half a Benadryl. The stuff forces me to sleep, but I hate it. Knocks me for a loop. Even after just a half-pill, it takes most of the morning to shake off the fog.

So by 9:30, when the four classmates met the instructor, I was still in a daze, nonfunctional.

However, an allergy pill is probably in order. So much crud has been floating and blowing in the air, my throat’s as sore as if I had a cold!

These summer storms, like the summer temperatures, have changed over the years as climate overall has changed. It used to be that starting around mid-July, we’d get short, spectacular rainstorms around four o’clock in the afternoon. These beautiful events — which really were gorgeous things, replete with wild lightning shows and 180-degree rainbows — would drop the ambient temperatures by 20 degrees: from the low 100s to about 80.

Now ambient temps are more like 110 to 120. The storms don’t come. It’s freaking August, for godsake, and this is the first real “monsoon” storm we’ve had here in the rain shadow of the North Mountains.

When they do finally show up, they’re fewer and far more violent. It’s not unreasonable to brace for a tornado, even though (thank God…so far) they’re nothing like the twisters that blow up in the South and the Plains states. Nevertheless, these are storms that kill the unwary and the stupid. And they don’t usually cut the heat that much.

We are, in a word, screwed.

Hm. I think I’ve said that before.

Spots of Light, Patches of Fog

Ugh! Just finished posting the daily multifarious ads for the multifarious bookoids on the multifarious Facebook sites and Twaddle, a time-consuming and tedious chore to beat all time-consuming and tedious chores.

Can’t complain too much, though: it’s only 8:37 a.m. Now the very worst chore of the day is off the desk. I can spend the rest of the next 16 hours or so loafing, playing with the dogs, sketching a new drawing, or maybe even writing a new Fire-Rider squib. So the sun burns through the fog, hm?

Here’s a little bright spot, surfacing in the side yard on a gray, thick, humid, HOT morning:

CactusFlower

Back in the fog: Ruby woke me up at 3:30 this morning with a threat to barf on the bed. Guess she was sickened by the antics at yesterday’s Republican convention. That was the only truly disgusting thing she got into yesterday.

At any rate, she escaped the bed before producing anything, and in fact recovered without woofing. Metaphorically, I mean.

Republicans. God. That’s not fog. That’s the Dark Night of the Soul. Check out this blood-curdling report from one of their elected delegates.

We’re all going to love it in British Columbia. Though I understand Newfoundland could use some new blood: maybe American refugees will be more welcome there.

Here’s what you need to take your mind off your own and America’s troubles: a nice, entertaining, escapist short story.

Seth

Scattered foggy patches: Have to pay the car registration. Thank you, God! No damned time-sucking emissions test this August. And it’s only $37 — in Arizona, car registration goes DOWN the older the car gets, the theory presumably being that they want drivers to keep their junkers as long as possible, and forgodSAKE don’t give them any ideas about replacing the clunk with safer, cleaner, more fuel-economical cars.

Arizona. The Land of the Bizarre.

Also have to fork over $340 to the Mayo, the amount Medicare and Medigap have paid toward the $650 bill sitting in accounts receivable. Presumably a check or two got lost in the mail. I’ll have to sift through three FAT folders of brain-boggling paperwork to see if I can find any lost checks

Fortunately, the community college district is sending (someday…let’s not hold our breath) around $565 to replace a lost check. That will cover the rest of the Mayo’s bill with a little left to spare. But what a fuckin’ nuisance.

The online bill-pay hoop-jumps and the search through file after file stuffed with incomprehensible paperwork will suck a massive amount of time out of this morning. Just the prospect is making me crabby as a cat.

It’s hot. It’s humid. The thermometer next to the chair where I tap away at this post reads 86 degrees. I need to clean the pool. Fog. Hot, clammy fog.

And finally, to end on a bright spot: Check out the great streaming channels emanating from Vermont Public Radio.

 

 

 

Don’t wanna work Monday

So I should be, at the very goddamned leastest, posting links to posts advertising my wares on FaceBook (two business pages, several “groups,” and my timeline: a half-dozen separate time-consuming mind-numbing actions), Twitter, Google+, and LinkedIn.

I should be hustling some new business for The Copyeditor’s Desk.

I should be writing new copy for Plain & Simple Press.

I should be writing some sort of personal-finance post for Funny about Money.

I should be trying, once again, to get into Goodreads so as to hustle my wares there, even though that cause appears to be too forlorn to waste more time on.

But y’know what?

Yeah. That’s correct:

i…

don’t…

wanna…

If it looks like work, if it sounds like work, if it smells like work, if it feels like work: I don’t wanna do it.

That’s not to say I’ve totally diddled the day away, so far.

compostThe new cute little composter arrived. It’s “Cute” (the maker’s term) because it really is quite small: maybe a third the size of the one the fake beekeeper destroyed.

At first as I unpacked it from its cardboard box, I was disappointed. Then thought…waaaitaminit here. Let’s not be stoopid about this.

As a practical matter, smaller is probably better. First, it’s a lot more manageable. The old one, when it was full, could be almost impossible to turn, so it took forever and a day to compost stuff — and I had to reach in there and toss stuff by hand. This thing will be easy to roll even if it’s full.

Second, the manufacturer has made two exceptionally smart improvements in the thing’s design. a) The lid and its opening are MUCH larger compared to the overall size of the tub; and b) they’ve developed a hinge held together with a long, sturdy pin. If you remove the pin, you can lift the lid off the tub, making it easy to lift or dump the compost out.

So. I decided I don’t just like the Cute Composter, I downright love it.

The little guy is now in his place by the side of the house, with a pile of leaves, exhausted potting soil from dead plant pots, and kitchen trimmings in his belly.

Yay! We soon will have compost, and this fall we will have a vegetable garden again, for the first time since the memory of Fatlady runneth not to the contrary.

Gerardo just blew in and blew out; while he was here, he had the underlings gather up some relatively seed-free dry leaves and deposit them in the little composter. It’s full just now, but I expect those will pack down as they start to degrade and as I sprinkle a little water in there. By planting time this fall, there should be some nice compost for the pots that will hold chard, lettuce, spinach, mâche, and some LGOs.

The writer’s group I belong to puts out an annual anthology. They’ve put out a call for submissions — theme has to do with “celebration.” I have an essay that fits, though it fits in a distant way.

So I diddled away a fair amount of the morning editing and tightening that — their length limit is 3,000 words, and the lash-up runs to a little over 3400 words. Managed to cut it down a bit. Last year they accepted an essay of about 3400 words, but they had a different editor. WTF…we’ll see what happens. Nothing ventured…

My son has wondered if he should throw his $20,000 emergency fund at a refinance of his house, given that this could cut his mortage payment by about 300 much-needed dollars a month. His dad advised him absolutely positively not to do that. When the subject came up yesterday, I seconded his dad’s motion. Discussion ensued; the question was left up in the air.

So I called Wonder-Financial-Advisor today. He thirded the motion. We believe he should hang onto the cash, given the still amazingly low interest rates.

The dad has urged M’hijito to make no move until after his 102-year-old grandmother passes away. The suggestion, never fully articulated, is that money could be forthcoming from the estate. Said dad is in charge of the grandmother’s finances and so should have some idea what he’s talking about.

But the question is: WHAT estate?

The old gal has been living in a nursing home for many years. She’s blind and deaf. By now whatever money she might have accrued must have been absorbed by her care. How could there be anything — ANYTHING — left?

Well, I personally don’t think there is any such thing. But why the ex- would advise my son along those lines not once but several times…hm? It escapes me.

Almost.

The immortal grandmother was the daughter — the only child — of a man who owned a lumber company that served Denver, Colorado. He was a prominent local businessman. When he died of advanced old age in 1977, his funeral was overrun by well-wishers from the business community. A LOT of people showed up.

I don’t know what happened to that business. But if he sold it, dollars to donuts he sold it for a substantial profit.

His background was Amish. As that factoid might lead you to imagine, he lived quietly and conservatively. Not sparsely, but frugally. I suppose it’s not outside the realm of possibility that there was a trust. That could have protected the estate from the clutches of the nursing home’s collection agents.

And if that’s the case, there could be a small amount of money there. It wouldn’t have to be much to solve my son’s financial problems, such as they are.

So I diddled away some more of the day on the Internet, trying to track down the old man and, mostly failing that, trying to find some trace of the business.

Total fail on the latter. Inconclusive on the first. Became bored and so brought that to a halt.

It’s now the middle of the afternoon, and I still do not feel up, in any wise, to working. and so…

Away.

 

 

 

Existential Questions on the Quantum Level

Is it possible that the “beneficial nematodes” WORKED?

paloverde-beetle-300x208Two years running, I bought (rather expensively) packages of “beneficial nematodes” that are imagined by their sellers to attack the root-munching grubs of the hated palo verde beetle. These I applied several times during the fall and winter of successive years. And two years running, well over a dozen giant beetle escape holes appeared in the following summers — indicating a heavy infestation that sooner or later will kill the spectacular Desert Museum hybrid palo verde tree that shelters the west side of the house from the scorching afternoon sun.

This year I’ve found about a half-dozen holes so far — and it’s getting fairly late in the season. The mature monster bugs start to dig their way out at the start of the monsoon season, along about the end of June. By now, mid-way through July, there should  be lots more escape holes.

So. I wonder it it takes several years of treatment with these little worms that so harry the offspring of the massive and tank-like palo verde beetle? They live underground for about four years, hatching and eating and growing and maturing. I wonder if the nematodes work to best effect on the youngest grubs? Possibly those that are already a couple of years old are strong enough to resist infection by these tiny creatures. Hm.

This morning I found one, just (1) more hole, way over by the orange tree that I  believe to be besieged by these damn beasts. When I was spreading nematodes, the citrus infestation wasn’t yet evident. So I didn’t sprinkle any of the little guys over there. Hmmm…

Therefore…

Should I diddle away some more money on beneficial nematodes this fall?

In the low desert, the summer heat is too hot for the little guys, at least so saith the Arizona-based dealer in the critters. On the other hand, though, I’ve really been pouring the water to the west side, having discovered that what ailed the climbing roses was drought, not old age or disease.

Note to self: call the Arbico lady and discuss.

Am I crazy to diddle away money on gardening at all?

compostProbably. Back and forth with JestJack over the cost of food and the frugal benefits of vegetable gardening reminded me that I really, really miss the Israeli composter my friend La Bethulia gave me some years ago. It was ruined by a jackass who said he was a beekeeper who could remove what appeared to be a hive a-growing in the thing and who, when he discovered only a horde of bees attracted by some honey on some bread I’d tossed into the composter, dumped a ton of nasty powdered insecticide in there before I could stop him.

The compost is what DOES make your garden grow in a place where the ground is mostly caliche.

This thing is bar none, THE best composter ever designed. There’s no assembly — you just set the rolling tub in its cradle, open the door, and toss in the stuff you want to compost. As the stuff turns into magical mystery dirt inside it, the moisture it collects drains into the cradle thingie, providing you with compost “tea” that you can pour on your potted plants, making them very, very happy. The composter itself can be rolled over and over on the cradle, tossing its contents and speeding the composting process nicely.

And yes. I just ordered up a new one from Amazon. Am I crazy?

Why do dogs eat sticks?

Ruby (taking the morning air beneath the shady orange tree): [crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch…]

Human: What are you doing?

Ruby: Crunching. [crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch…]

Human: You threw up this morning! Might this not be the cause, oh worthy hare-brained dog?

Ruby: Feed me, human. Feed me! [crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch…]

Am I crazy to think my clothes get cleaner when I wash them by hand?

i. hate. the. samsung. goddamn. washer!
i. hate. the. samsung. goddamn. washer!

This discovery was made when I took to soaking jeans and other colored clothing in a pail, with a dollop of original Dawn detergent, and then running them through the hated Samsung washer’s “rinse” cycle. This, to opt out of the “braid” effect — and because the rinse cycle runs all of 21 minutes, where as a cycle that uses enough water to actually get everything in a washload wet takes an hour and ten minutes, for godsake.

You don’t even have to rinse the detergent out of the clothing. Just dump out the pail of water, let the water mostly drain out of the clothes, and toss them into the machine. The extra weight caused by the wet load triggers the stupid washer to dispense enough water to rinse the clothes effectively.

It turns out that when you let a load of laundry soak for a few minutes in dish detergent, then make the ridiculous “energy-efficient” washer rinse them and ONLY rinse them, everything comes out brighter and distinctly cleaner-looking than what you get after upwards of an hour of shloshing and tangling around in an ineffective amount of water with ineffective “HE” laundry detergent.

Everything that’s white comes out…you know, white. And without stains.

And you get the job done with a fraction of the power usage and a fraction of the wasted time.

WHY can’t I ever, ever, EVER post one of these squibs without finding a mistake after it’s published?

Old age? Innate incompetence? Freudian issues with computers?

What is the answer?

Earth to humans: Unknown.