So a few minutes before 8 a.m., Ruby the Corgi and I get back to the house after an hour’s trudge through unholy heat and humidity. ALL I WANT is to get back in the house, back in the air-conditioning, and sit down with a glass of water in my paw.
But nooooooo….NOT A CHANCE!
As we approach the front yard, we find a dog-loving moron standing there, with her own overheated hound. She awaits our approach, simpering inanely.
Dammit. If you’ve lived with a dog longer than six months you should know: Dogs are NOT your little “furbabies”! They’re CARNIVORES. Tribal carnivores, whose instinct is to defend themselves and their fellow pack members against all comers.
No matter how pea-brained the comer!
Problem is, city folk tend to confuse dogs with kids. They think their dog is on a par with their eight-year-old. And they imagine you think the same. Gawdlmighty, these people are stupid!
So we try to go around the front-yard visitor. This doesn’t work. She and her dog come to greet us.
GO! AWAY! YOU IDIOT!
No amount of attempted mental telepathy or body language helps. She comes bounding over to us. And yeah…right off, the two dogs go at it!
Jayzuz, am I tired of stupid!!!!!
We — Ruby and I — manage to get inside the gate without bloodshed. But it was close. Very close.
Can’t say this kind of stupid stuff happens every time Ruby and I go out for a walk. If it did, we wouldn’t go walking. But it surely does happen enough to annoy the Hell outta you.
Actually, it happens enough to lead me to think maybe I shouldn’t go out walking with Ruby. At all.
Hate to do that! Ruby needs the exercise. And so do I.
But jeez. One of these days, somebody — canine or human — is gonna get hurt!