Coffee heat rising

Tax Time Sneaking Up: Are You Organized?

The accountant is getting antsy for 1099s. Where are the 1099s? Don’t I know it’s TIME TO DO THE TAXES? Well….yes. Where are the 1099s, there in the disorganized organization that passes for my file drawers?

Thought I’d saved the PDFs to disk. But if I did, I can’t find them. As the desktop iMac has slowly faded into senility, I’ve slowly migrated my operations to the MacBook. But the MacBook won’t talk to the decrepit printer; the only computer I can print off of is the iMac. The iMac is connected to the external hard drive, and so I’m constantly e-mailing stuff back and forth because I never have figured out how to hard wire them together and because the directory organization is now different in the two machines and I don’t want them getting conflated and because I’ve been too lazy and too techno-flummoxed to update to whatever species of large cat is the current OS so I can get into iCloud and right now I’m too sick to brave the crowds at the Apple store to contend with that. Which is a disorganized way of saying no, I’m not organized!

The trouble with a small business is that like membership in Medicare, it breeds great wads of paper. Paper multiplies in my file drawers as wire coat hangers breed in the dark of a closet. I need more file cabinet space. And I need to quit structuring my filing system on the fly.

So this morning the dogs got locked out of the room while I spread the contents of several hanging file folders across the floor and reorganized them. Now, I think, we have it:

Hanging file 1: S-Corp receipts

• File Folder: Receipts: current year
• File Folder: Receipts: last year
• File Folder: Receipts: from long ago

Hanging file 2: S-corp tax stuff

• File Folder: Tax paper: current year
• File Folder: Tax paper: last year
• File Folder: Tax paper: from long ago

Hanging file 3: S-corp incorporation papers

• File Folder: CE Desk incorporation paperwork

Hanging file 4: Website hosting and monetizing

• File Folder: Domain names
• File Folder: Bluehost
• File Folder: Adsense

And what, you might reasonably ask, is meant by the term “tax paper”? Well, it’s all those pieces of paper people throw at you or you throw at others that might have some bearing on tax preparation other than receipts for purchases: stubs for checks received showing the job for which the check paid; statements sent to the issuers of said checks; statements sent from vendors; several strange pieces of paper emanated by the Great Desert University. If I don’t know how to classify it and I think someday an auditor will demand to see it, that’s where it goes.

Yeah, I know: why the hell aren’t I scanning all this garbage to disk?

Well, first because my scanner runs s-o-o-o-o-o slowly that it’s actually painful to use. There are other things I’d rather do, in the brief time allotted to me on this earth, than sit here and watch that scanner groan along.

Second, because I don’t trust digital stuff. It’s all very nice to back it up to a hard disk. But what happens when the burglars steal that along with your computer?

Third, because I figure iCloud comes with my MacMail subscription and that’s where I ought to be storing this stuff. It’s cheaper than Carbonite and looks like it will be easier to use. Maybe.

Fourth, because I’ve been too lazy to break free enough time to go deal with the Apple people and figure out how to get iCloud going.

Fifth, because I’ve been putting all that off until I buy a new iMac (or something) but haven’t gotten around to buying a new iMac (or something) because I haven’t decided which I really need, a new iMac or a second MacBook or a Mac Mini with a large monitor/TV screen, and besides I need a new printer/scanner but haven’t figured out which one of those I want, either. We call that “cascading excuses.”

It’s the Niagara Falls of cascading excuses, come to think of it.

Time to turn off the tap on the excuses. Let’s consider what we need to save and how it can best be organized to simplify data storage and retrieval.

For your business you need:

• Records of your business’s organization and registration with government agencies
• Proof of income
• Proof of expenses
• Records of payments to contractors and agents
• Banking records
• Credit card records
• Copies of government forms filled out and submitted by you
• Copies of government forms filled out and submitted by your paid contractors, agents, and customers
• Information about your vendors, clients, and subcontractors

Almost all of these are now accessible electronically and can be saved as PDFs. Others, such as hard-copy checks, can be scanned to disk.

The ideal filing system, in my ideal world, would have electronic and hard-copy incarnations, and both would be organized along the same lines.

Online

Folder: Receipts

• Scanned receipts for operating expenses, supplies, and travel
• Scanned or downloaded receipts for website hosting, domain names

Folder: Clients & correspondence

• Copies of e-mail correspondence
• Scanned copies of hard-copy correspondence
• Spreadsheet recording clients’ e-mails, Website addresses, snail-mail addresses, rates, amounts billed, and amounts collected
• Statements to clients, organized by client name and date

Folder: Incorporation Records

• Scanned copies of original incorporation forms and records
• Copies of annual corporate reports
• Scanned copies of payment records

Folder: Subcontractors

• Each person’s W-9
• Each person’s 1099
• Invoices from each subcontractor

Folder: Banking records

• Copies of checks scanned for e-deposit
• Monthly or semi-monthly Quickbooks downloads
• Scanned or downloaded copies of credit card statements
• Scanned or downloaded bank account statements
• Downloaded PayPal statements

Folder: Income records

• Adsense statements
• Amazon Associates statements
• Advertiser statements
• Royalty statements
• PDF pay statements from community college (personal, really; but might as well keep all the income records together)

Hard Copy

Hanging file folder: Receipts

• Receipts: Original receipts for every expense
• Charitable Giving: Receipts for donations

Hanging file folder: Statements and Invoices

• Statements from vendors and business organizations
• Invoices to clients

Hanging file folder: Correspondence

• Any hard-copy correspondence that arrives or is sent by snail-mail
• Printouts of e-mail correspondence that might be important

Hanging file folder: Incorporation records

• Annual reports
• Copies of annual government fee
• Original incorporation papers

Hanging file folder: Website hosting

• Bluehost
• Domain name records

Hanging file folder: Subcontractors

• W-9s
• 1099s
• Invoices from subcontractors

Hanging file folder: Banking records

• Original checks scanned for e-deposit with bank receipt printout
• Monthly or semi-monthly Quickbooks downloads, hard copy
• Original credit card statements
• Original bank account statements
• Downloaded PayPal statements, hard copy

Hanging file folder: Pay statements

• Printouts of community college pay statements

Hmh. That’s going to take a few hours (as in “days and days”) to put together. Meanwhile of course we’ll be keeping up with blogging, teaching, editing copy, and hustling business at the same time. 🙄

The heck with it. I’m going to take a nap.

Have you got a system? What’s it look like?

Swimming Pool Delittering Joy

Last night the wind blew briskly enough to pick up several sections of the newspaper that I’d left on the table under the patio cover. It pulled each section apart and scattered newspaper pages all over the yard. One double-truck spread even landed in the pool.

Took all of about ten seconds to walk around and pick these up. The result, after this heavy labor:

Lookee there! Ten feet down, not ONE devil pod or devil leaf. Floating atop the surface, not ONE blob of devil-tree pollen.

That is one litter-free pool!

Mwa ha ha! I am going to be so happy to burn the logs from the accursed devil-pod tree in the fireplace next winter!

Because the nights have been unusually warm, the water’s not even very cold. And today was lovely, warm and sunny. If I weren’t pounding on Death’s door with some lunger epizootic, I’d consider taking a plunge.

Charley and the Ferocious Corgi

CharleyCassie, late the beaten-down 25-pound victim of the gallumphing Charley the Golden Retriever Puppy, has come into her own. All of a sudden one day it dawned on her that even though he weighs three times more than she does, she’s bigger than him.

The astonishing thing is, he thinks so, too. She actually chases him around the yard, around and around the trees and back and forth in a great steeplechase. Haven’t managed any good photos of these antics, because they’re very fast and digital cameras are very slow. Cassie moves like a rocket; the only reason Charley can outrun her is that one of his strides equals about eight of hers. And, I think, she lets him outrun her—that’s part of the game. In any event, attempts to photograph them end in brown and white blurs.

Cassie cultivates an absolutely terrifying wolf-like growl. Addressed to a human, it would make you or me climb up the nearest tree. Charley thinks it’s hilarious. He rears back on his hind legs, assumes a goofy grin, and waves his front paws at her. This causes her to charge him, growling, roaring, and snapping. She never makes contact—clearly she has no intention of biting. But you couldn’t prove that by me.

In addition to the dawn steeplechase, we have the daily Bully-Stick Competition. Dried bull dongs are to dogs as diamonds and rubies are to humans. Except humans don’t eat diamonds and rubies. This morning I realized Charley is deliberately baiting Cassie with these things.

Usually I give each dog a bully stick (gotta be fair around here). Instead of one dog going off in one corner and the other to another corner to chew, Cassie drops hers on the floor and charges Charley, growling and barking. She takes his away from him. He walks over and grabs the other one. She drops her prize and goes after him again. He jumps up in the air and waves his paws around. And so it goes, loudly and boisterously, for 15 or 20 minutes. Often Cassie loses interest in the object and comes into my office to sleep under the desk. Charley then ends up with both of them.

Yesterday when he was here he left one of these pricey toys—which cost about as much as diamonds and rubies—in the back yard. So when he went out on the porch for his morning policing of the property (he has to be sure everything is still in its place), I handed it to him. Cassie was in the kitchen glaring out at him. He picked it up and threw it at her. Well of course she emitted a lupine roar and charged out the door like a wild beast in a Roman arena. A huge “fight” ensued, with much bouncing, barking, growling, and lunging. Ridiculous!

Sometimes these encounters end with Charley standing four-footed in front of her and emitting a long series of monotonous barks: warf! warf! warf! warf! warf! warf!… “SHUT UP, DOG!”

Apparently in Dogese “warf!” means “mine!” Or maybe “give it back!”

At any rate, from the Human’s perspective, it’s a relief to see that she now can hold her own with him. Clearly he’s not going to hurt her. And it’s interesting to consider how long it’s taken for them to come to this accommodation. Maybe it’s because he was such a young puppy at first…possibly female dogs have some instinct that prevents them from beating up on little pups. Or possibly a pup has to achieve some maturity before it learns how pack hierarchy works. Whatever, now that he’s about seven months old, she has unmistakably established her primacy.

Charley in hot pursuit

Out of My Face, Google!

{Ugh} Mention that you’re having a bout with bronchitis, look up the prescription meds online before blithely swallowing any damnfool thing your doctor shoves at you, and you’re blitzed with ads for prescription cold nostrums and asthma treatments!

Damn, but I hate that! Am I the only neurotic who gets the galloping creeps by having Google peering over her shoulder all the time?

This is the worst bug I’ve ever had. My whole torso hurts from hacking. Last night I coughed until I couldn’t breathe, coughed until I was spitting up blood. Even standing in the shower til the hot water ran out didn’t help.

Finally gave up and used the albuterol inhaler she prescribed. It’s tricky to learn to use…but it did help. Was finally able to get to sleep around one or two ayem.

But I’m not takin’ that prednisone, dammit. It has some nasty side effects. One of my peculiarities is that if a drug has a weird side effect, I am going to get it.

She also gave me an antibiotic in the same class as a drug I’m allergic to and that, like prednisone, is given to tearing up your gut. She did recommend not taking it for several days, until we see if this thing starts to clear up. Despite an elevated white cell count, she still thinks it’s probably viral, which would mean there’s no point in making myself sicker with antibiotics.

Saw a study last night that showed albuterol is more effective than antibiotics in causing the cough of bronchitis to subside within seven days. Sure hope it works. This is the pits!

I’ve had so many prescription drugs make me sick that I’m very careful about what I’ll take. Doctors, in my experience, often don’t know what these things can do—they clearly don’t know or don’t appreciate the discomfort of the potential side effects, or they don’t care. In some cases, I’ve thought a doctor dissembled to trick me into taking something that made me sicker than the ailment. They’re heavily lobbied by drug lobbyists who come to their door to sell them on this, that, and the other expensive new concoction, and they don’t really have time to look up and understand what the stuff does. So they believe what the manufacturers’ reps tell them.

But to the subject at hand: I’d just as soon not have Google watching me try to figure out which prescription drugs I’ll take and which I won’t.

I understand they’re going to ramp up this strategy by linking virtually every device you use and tracking your every move. Makes me glad I refuse to carry a cell phone.

Cut choir last night—it’ll be a long time before I’m able to sing again. May be out for the rest of the season. Cutting the business group meeting this morning. Can’t cut class today, because I won’t get paid if I don’t show up, and I really need the money…especially with a new passel of medical bills headed my way. Fortunately, part of this semester’s scheme involves lots of videos. Tuesday the librarian kept them busy for both periods…thank god! No way could I have talked three hours straight. And amazingly, I had actually scheduled a video for today. So that’s decidedly what they’re getting.

Ugh ugh ugh! It’s after 7 and now I’ve got to run to get Cassie fed before M’hijito shows up with Charley.

 

Check Out My New Blog!

As if I didn’t have enough on my plate, I decided it would be fun (and maybe someday profitable) to start a new blog in which to vent and rave about my teaching adventures. Called Adjunctorium, it just went live in WordPress.com.

This’ll be the beta version. If it goes over reasonably well after, say, three or four months, then I’ll move it over to BlueHost so as to monetize it a bit.

Go on over and check it out! Lemme know if it looks promising.