Funny about Money

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. ―Edmund Burke

Death’s Door: Still Locked…

Not yet, you!

Welp, much as I keep pounding at Death’s Door, they still won’t let me in!

Visited the pulmonologist this morning, just dead sure that the twelve weeks of gurgling, wet, sloppy, asphyxiating goddamn cough has got to be adult-onset asthma. This suspicion was aggravated by a recent check-up at the Mayo, where a physician’s assistant opined that it could be allergy-mediated asthma.

So the doc did a breathing test at the office: not asthma. Then he sent me off for an X-ray: nothing visible inside there. But I did get to see and play with two of THE cutest little kids you ever imagined could exist, whilst sitting around the lab’s waiting room. 😀

Still coughing, but it’s slightly better than it was a few days ago. He thinks it’s probably an infection, because on one (count it, 1) day of the 12 weeks this thing has run, I spiked a 102-degree fever.

There’s still still hope for a dire outcome — the hypochondriac never gives up… It could be GERD, which can cause a cough like this when stomach acid regurgitates up into your lungs. If that’s the case, then the fever would have been incidental, presumably caused by some other ailment.

Pollen, up close

But in fact, the wind has been blowing nonstop for the past three months — yesterday was the first in weeks that the wind wasn’t whipping around. After all that phenomenal winter rain, every plant on the desert has burst into frantic and joyous pollen-spreading bloom. So…even though this thing has never evinced typical cold or flu symptoms — no sore throat, no head congestion, no headache, no collywobbles — chances are it’s just a combination of a cold plus pollen allergies.

Dang it. I can’t lose!

Death image: Statue in the Cathedral of Trier, Germany; photo  by Jbuzbee – CC BY 3.0,
Pollen: By Dartmouth Electron Microscope Facility, Dartmouth College – Public Domain. Dartmouth Electron Microscope Facility ([1], [2]), Public Domain,

Author: funny

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  1. It’s good that you’re going to live (yea!) but did you get a prescription or did they recommend any OTC meds? Also, what are collywobbles?

    • No, he didn’t. He seemed to think that unless something showed up on the X-ray, it was probably a viral infection and would (someday during my lifetime??) pass. He thought it was OK to use Benadryl if I imagine it makes me feel better, but probably pointless. The collywobbles = diarrhea.

      He called late yesterday to say the X-ray was clear, so presumably I’m not enjoying lung cancer, pneumonia, Valley fever, or an invasion of the body-snatchers.

  2. I had a bad cough like that, that lasted for like 3 months. It turns out that I had the whooping cough. I am allergic to pertussis so I couldn’t get that part of the shot and it turns out that I got the whooping cough. So doctors are hesitant to report it but if they don’t know you could always ask about that 🙂

    • Oh, DRAT, how awful: catching the very bug whose inoculation you’re allergic to! Very sorry to hear that.

      I’m not allergic (so far…) to any of the usual immunizations, and I’ve had the Dtap shot within the past year. But when I got home this afternoon from Young Dr. Kildare’s office, I immediately looked up a term he’d used: tussive syndrome. And lo! there it is listed as a possible aftermath of whooping cough.

      But it can happen even after a very bad cold or flu. Hm. I suppose it could have been a case of whooping cough that was moderated a bit by the vaccine. He didn’t mention the words “whooping cough,” but he surely does know me well enough to be certain that the minute I left his office I would fly home and google “tussive syndrome.”

      If this was an attenuated case of pertussis, I guess I’m REALLY lucky I got that shot a few months ago. Whooping cough can be very serious for old farts and for kids…it’s bad enough for young, healthy adults.

  3. I’m so sorry you’re still feeling so lousy. Some stuff you just. can’t. shake. It has to get bored and go away on its own.

    That viral thing I was whining about on my website a few weeks back finally went away. Unfortunately, DF’s mother and her longtime companion* now have it and are feeling “rotten,” as she cheerfully described it. They’re both in their late 80s and lung issues are no joke. But there’s not much you can do about it. Damn viruses!

    I got the Dtap last week, and also the shingles shot once I determined that my insurance covered it. (A lot easier to PREVENT this stuff than it is to treat it, right?) Since I do have asthma, lung stuff is no joke for me, either.

    *They’ve been together for more than 40 years but she maintains her independence and prefers not to remarry. As he describes it, “We consort but we do not cohabit.”

    • It’s a good idea to get those inoculations. Shingles is no joke, either — I met a woman who had been enjoying shingles for two years at the time we were introduced…with no end in sight. The pain was excruciating and debilitating. The shot may not stop you from developing it, but apparently it shortens its duration and makes it milder. The shot is expensive, but you only take it once.

      Also be sure to look into pneumonia shots; there are now TWO of them, and they need to be taken, like the flu shot, more often.

      You remind me that I have to call the Old Folks and ask how he’s doing. He came down with this thing (I suspect) and was told by his docs that he has COPD and congestive heart failure. They’ve got him on a nebulizer and O2.

      Young Dr. Kildare, when consulted a few days ago, reported that the heavy cold people have been complaining about all winter is not ONE nasty virus but SEVERAL.