Coffee heat rising

Dogs Are…Weird

Did you know a corgi can go on point? And will, enthusiastically!

It’s the weirdest silly thing you ever saw: A tiny, furry, little pointy-eared dog standing on point outside the shrubbery that Ratty just ran into. She also knows when Ratty is residing in the marjoram bed and occasionally will go on point without a chase.

In fact, the corgi apparently was bred specifically as a ratter: to harry the incidental wildlife that would take up residence on sailing ships.

She will not enter the shrubbery, though she probably would if I encouraged it. When Ratty decides to make a run for it, she chases the little gal like a rocket across the yard and into the cat’s claw vines.

It’s not clear that Ratty’s first instinct is to run or to hide. Roof rats are spectacular climbers. They will go right straight up a vertical wall at a dead run, without even slowing down. And that would be why the attic needs to be sealed thoroughly, or why poison baits should be scattered around the attic.

I’m not at all comfortable putting out poison, because…well, frankly, I’m afraid if Ruby finds a Ratty corpse and decides to chew on it, that will be the end of Ruby. Guess I’d druther have Ratty in the shrubbery than have no Ruby around the house.

One wonders, though…  Why do we think birds and chipmunks and squirrels are so cute around the backyard, but have such a phobia about roof rats? I mean…the critters really are just another species of wildlife. If they’re not chewing on the electric wiring (hey! seal up that attic, f’r hevvinsake), who cares if they’re ambling around the back yard, stealing birdseed and eating the cat food?

A…n…d… Ninety Degrees and Overcast

Heh…I failed to post yesterday’s fine entry. So that just went online. This one will, too, in a few minutes…assuming I don’t faint and fall on the floor first.

{boyoboy, how d’ye like that alliteration! Shoulda been a poet!}

It’s 7 in the morning. Ninety degrees in the shade of the back porch overhang. Ruby and I just got back from the morning doggywalk, an hour-long stroll through the outer reaches of Hell.

It would like to rain out there, evidently. The clouds are low enough…but they’re wayyyy too thin. If we get rain today, it won’t be till late afternoon. When it’s even hotter than it is now. Wunderground sez that’s 96 degrees — at seven in the morning!! — and predicts a high of 114.

Forest fires along State Route 87, the road to Payson — whereinat KJG and Mr. Fireman repaired for their retirement. Their kids are down here, so it’s possible that they’ve come down from the mountain and are staying with them. I hope.

Meanwhile, the town of Sunflower has been evacuated — the residents moved to a center out in Fountain Hills.

This morning when I let Ruby out for her first frolic around the back yard, what should I find but a RAT, caught in the trap I’d left unbaited on the back porch.

Since, unlike my son, I can’t bring myself to drown the poor little thang, I hiked him down the alley and tossed him out near a fine pile of debris. Now, as my son is given to saying angrily, he’s someone else’s problem.

b-a-a-a-a-a-a-d human!

Gerardo just called to inform me that he and his crew are on the way over here to fix a leaking pipe.

?????????

Thought they’d already done that! They dug up the ground on the east side and repaired the leaking pipe under there.

But…well…it looks like there’s some other leak out there. So let’s see if they can figure out what it is and fix it.

Meanwhile, I’ve had no breakfast and the cleaning lady will be here this morning and the last thing I need is Gerardo banging around all morning.

Let’s put this post on “hold” for a couple hours… Maybe I can at least bolt down a piece of toast before the guys show up. Ugh!

*****

Ehhh…just barely.

You have not seen a human being work until you’ve watched a Mexican trabajador work. My GOD, that man is just astonishing.

He dug and wrestled and wrestled and dug and dug and wrestled…all this digging and wrestling was going on in soggy, sticky mud. He found a stretch of busted pipe, which by dint of sheer strength he replaced.

Looks like the system is working now, at least in back. But as he pointed out, it’s old. Satan and Proserpine put in the system when they were here and doing their Happy Handyman thing. Gerardo pointed out that I’ve been in this house a good 10 or 15 years, meaning the system is older than that.

He thinks the whole system is gonna have to be replaced. And THAT is gonna be an expensive proposition.

Speaking of expensive propositions, AMEX called late last week to harass me. They claimed last month’s bill hadn’t been paid. I said it certainly had. They said it certainly hadn’t.

And NATCHERLY the credit union’s system wouldn’t let me into my account!!!!

So, goddammit, now I’ve got to get dressed and traipse across the city to the CU — in 115-degree heat — to try to find out WTF happened there.

I pay the American Express bills electronically. And assuredly I DID pay that statement — or at least tried to.

When the system blocked me from my account while I had the AMEX representative on the phone, it made me look like a shifty fool. So needless to say, I’m a bit peeved by this bit of bullshit.

After this, I’ll pay those bills with paper checks.

 

Summertime, and the Livin’ Is…

…annoying…

Fish are jumpin’,
’cause they’re boiling in their pond

Oh your mama’s rich,
And you’re daddy’s…uhm…good-lookin’
So hush, little baby,
Don’t you fricasee…

Summer has done come in! The heat here in lovely uptown Phoenix defies belief…but that’s normal. As a practical matter, though, it feels hotter than the 110 degrees we see on the back-porch thermometer, because it’s getting humid.

This time of year — a little later normally, as a practical matter — is our rainy season. So-called “monsoon” storms blow in from the Gulf of Mexico, usually producing thunderstorms and rain in the late afternoon and evening.

So far we haven’t seen any rain. But we have seen (or rather, felt) the usual accompanying humidity. This morning’s doggy-walk was sweltering and muggy — that was at 5:30 a.m. Now, at 6:00 p.m. and after a full day of blistering sun it’s hotter than the hubs out there.

The pool isn’t much good for keeping cool: it feels like a hot bathtub just now! Seriously: I like a fairly HOT bath…and when I got in pool this morning, the water literally was as warm as my typical bath. Wow!

Meanwhile, forests are burning down. A big fire is holding forth up near Payson, where Mr. and Mrs. Fireman moved after they sold their palace in the West Valley. State Route 87 is the road up the hill to Payson, a forested little burg habituated by retirees and ranchers.

In-Effing-Credible….

Whatever you want, whatever you need, whatever you have to do, it HAS to be the hard way!

LOL!

This morning I wanted to run by the grocery store to pick up an extension cord for the laptop and, while I was at it, replenish the pantry a bit. Visits to two huge supermarkets yielded NO extension cord. But I did find one at the neighborhood Albertson’s, my very least favorite place to shop because of the shady adventures in the parking lot. I head for the check-out with that and a bottle of cheap white…and am told…

Nope.

No. No, I cannot buy a bottle of wine.

Why? Because it’s Sunday morning. In Arizona, it’s illegal to sell alcoholic beverages of any kind before noon on Sunday. Holy holy holeeeeee….

Shee-ut!!! I’d forgotten about that!

Furious, I walked out and left the other stuff I’d intended to buy — admittedly not much, but if I have to go to some other store or shop at some other time, why should I stand in line at a cash register twice?

Aren’t you happy, don’t you feel privileged to have sanctimonious Kris-tee-anns looking out for your morals?

It’s 11:34 now. In another 20 minutes, I’ll set out for AJ’s, where I’druther fork over my money, if fork over I must. The only reason I didn’t drive down there this morning was that I do not feel like shopping and I just wanted to get the damned errand-running over with.

In another fine snafu, apparently American Express never received this month’s payment. Got a threatening collection letter from them.

Called. They have THE best customer service people! Talked at length with a sweetie-pie who has an exotic accent. Got that straightened out. They’re forgiving the late charge; first thing tomorrow morning I will head over to the credit union and get that bill paid electronically.

I still haven’t seen the bill. Don’t see it anywhere around the Funny Farm. Probably it got delivered to the neighbor who got SDXB’s house when the City bought it and gave to them (yes: FREE!) after the new airport runway displaced them. That address has the same street number, but a one-word difference in the streets’ name — like Neighborhood Lane vs. Neighborhood Road. Stuff is misdelivered all the time. I have to mark on orders from Amazon “ROAD, please, not Lane!” Otherwise, they take stuff to her and I never see it.

Bein’ from a totally different socioeconomic world, she and her family don’t forward misdelivered packages or mail. If it’s mail, they just throw it in the trash. If it’s a package, they apparently keep it for themselves.

Interesting how customs differ, even within a given country.

Welp…in another 20 minutes, God will allow me to buy a bottle of dinner wine. So I might as well get started traipsing down to AJ’s.

Every Which Way from Sunday…

I swear-ta-gawd, the hassles and the hustles never stop. They come in every which way from Sunday, and they come in every day AND Sunday.

Today, in comes an email purporting to be from Fidelity, where vast quantities of my father’s and DXH’s money are invested. And it is one weird email…

They want me to send them my signature.

Got that? They want to capture my signature electronically.

Uh huh.

So that ever so many Great Endeavors can be vastly simplified. And speeded up. And…

Uh huh.

Well.

To begin with, I don’t do business directly with Fidelity. I hire a guy, affectionately known in these precincts as Financial Dude, to run interference with Fidelity and just about all else financial in my life.

To end with, where the Hell did Fidelity get my personal email? BECAUSE I don’t do business with them directly, there’s no reason they should have my mac.com address.

Understand: I don’t believe Fidelity is trying to scam me. What I think is that either a)  this is a legitimate message that for some incomprehensible reason was not sent through my financial manager or b) it’s a scam by crooks who found out that I had a Fidelity account and managed to extract the account number.

Scammers, many of them overseas, routinely target elder Americans. Check out this jaw-dropping piece from a guy who’s in the business of tracking them.

What I’m finding is that even when you’re aware of this phenomenon, even when you don’t pick up a phone unless you know who’s on the other end, it’s still hard to avoid. The scammers are bold; they’re convincing; and they’re persistent.

***

Financial Dude says it’s not a scam: they just want an updated signature on some paperwork. I have no idea who to call there. And soooo… About the best I can do is tell whoever sent this request that there’s no way I’m sending my signature anywhere over the Internet, and they’ll need to send something in hard copy.

Heh. Won’t they just love that?

 

You Thought the Hubs Were Hot?

A-n-n-d…once again: 109 degrees on the shaded back porch, where direct sunlight never intrudes. But this evening we’ve got some overcast blowing in.

That may bode well: rain will break the heat, if only for a few hours. Hmmm…but does it have meaning?

Checking with the beloved Wunderground: Tonight we’re supposed to drop to a chilly 93 degrees; cloudy with SSE winds shifting to N at 15 mpg. Brrr! Tomorrow we have 114 forecast.

Purchased some roach bait this afternoon, but haven’t roused enough ambition to put it out. Ruby the Corgi must not eat it…so…uhmm… Yeah! Gotta figure out how to lay the stuff out so our eight-legged boarders will enjoy snacking on it, while at the same time keeping it out of the pooch’s reach.

Good luck with that!

The rats are merrily ignoring the baited traps. No doubt they think those things are very funny…