Coffee heat rising

Life in the Desert

Hubs of Hades Central!

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LOL! Yesterday I reported that it was hotter than the hubs of Hades here. And yea, verily: so it was.

BUT…we hadn’t seen Hades yet, by yesterday afternoon. Today it’s handsomely HOT and stickily HUMID. Ick!!!!

Seriously: I’d planned to walk over to one of the three nearby grocery stores and pick up a few food items this morning.

Uh…no. Nope, noooo indeed.

Fortunately, we have plenty of dawg food: enough to last a good week or ten days.

Human food: likewise. Plenty of frozen salmon, pieces of steak, pasta, veggies, and whatnot.

Shouldn’t have to raid a grocer for at least ten days; probably two weeks. Amazon will ship the dog food. Human food also: to a degree….but personally, I like to see and examine my own chow before I buy it. This, however, should not be a problem. Just get out of the house about the time a store opens, and it should be easy to dodge the soggy heat.

My neighbor was out front pruning shrubbery when I trotted past his house. Man of steel, I’ll tellya! You couldn’t pay me to do that in this weather. BUT…it does have to be done…and hiring some hapless wretch to do it for you is likely to bankrupt you.

At any rate, as I frolicked  past, he assured me that he would drive me to a store if need be.   🙂

The supermarkets nearby (three of them!) open at around 7:00 a.m. So if I roll out of the sack at sunrise, I’ll be able to walk over to a nice store and stock up on whatever I need, before it gets too hot. But seriously: I don’t think that will be necessary for awhile.

PLUS: the other day a neighbor invited me to visit the nearby Sprouts with her. She drove us over there. That was nice…AND it was fun. So I may be able to talk her into a repeat trip.

And a variety of professionals and service providers operate within walking distance:

* ophthalmologist
* veterinarian
* computer store (2 of ’em)
* drugstore/pharmacy
* supermarkets (2 huge ones), each with its own pharmacy (a third lurks across Main Drag West)
* hair stylist

On and on and on, actually…. Truth to tell, there really is no need to go outside the Funny Farm’s immediate neighborhood to get about 98% of one’s standard needs done. Especially with Amazon filling in the gaps!

Y’know, this is how it was when DXH and I lived in London for several months, while I worked on the Robert Sidney book. We never needed a car, unless we took it into our heads to go sight-seeing in the country. I suppose that means Phoenix has “grown up” as a city: it now functions as a genuine metropolis.

WhatEVER: just now I feel pretty confident that I’ll be able to live here at the Funny Farm for at least a couple more years — maybe longer than that. Especially if I can hire someone to come in and take care of the house, drive me to requisite destinations, and generally ride herd on me.

We shall see if that proves to be true! 😀

Hotter than the Hubs…

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Did you know you can work up a lather just by walking around a few blocks in your neighborhood?

😀

Well. Yeah: if you live in (un)lovely Arizona, you sure can!

It is HOT and WET out there! Lightly overcast: feels almost like Saudi Arabia used to feel. And that, for those who haven’t enjoyed the experience, feels a great deal like the inner circles of Hell.

That notwithstanding, today’s damp and steamy stroll was surprisingly pleasant. Passed a young couple in their front yard, showing off their new baby to friends. awwwww! 

<3  <3  <3

Our financial advisor was supposed to send over a candidate for the cleaning lady position he (unilaterally) proposes to offer. NEVVERMIND that I have a very fine cleaning lady who has worked for me over the past several  years and whom I have no intention of replacing.

Hey! I’m just the Little Woman, right? Who cares what I think?

Anyway, if she showed up while I was stumbling around the ‘Hood, I missed her. She didn’t call and she didn’t leave a note, so I’ll assume either she never surfaced or else he smartened up enough to call her off.

😀

Life. Gets sillier and sillier, doesn’t it?

Passed a new life as I was ambling about: a young couple with a brand-new baby. Too, too delightful. 

Dayum, but I love this neighborhood. And “love this neighborhood” is THE specific reason I do NOT wish to be locked up the the Beatitudes, an old-folkerie from Hell.

How the Hell do I evade that?

****

Do hafta say, though, that this IS the nicest neighborhood I’ve ever lived in. And since I’ve lived in places all over the damn planet — from here to Saudi Arabia — that is sayin’ something. And that’s why I most decidedly NOT want to be moved out of here.

For what it costs to live in a prison for old folks, I’m pretty sure I can hire someone to come here and take care of me. You can be damn sure I’m gonna try, anyhow.

Main trick will be to find someone responsible, competent, and incapable of stealing stuff.

And, as you know…that’ll be a trick! 

😀

STUNG!

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black widow spiderOne of Arizona’s fine black widow spiders caught me on the left foot yesterday. CHOMP!

Hurt?  Lemme tellya hurt!

Called St. Joe’s hospital. They said to watch and wait. If it flares up a lot, to come in to see a doctor.

Yeah. Well. Looks like I’ll be paying them a visit, soon enough.

Oddly, the neuropathy in the hands seems milder, as though it has settled down a bit.

So pretty clearly the mad tingling and hurting in the left foot and lower leg are aftermath of the spider bite.

WHEN, forgawdsake, is this stuff EVER GONNA STOP???

Hotter Than a Two-Dollar Cookstove…

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So in my latest post, there I am raving on about how happy I don’t have a laborer’s job, flinging myself and a pile of tools around in the ungodly heat. And…egad!  I kid you not: ANY manual-labor job that has to be done outdoors is downright suicidal on an Arizona summer day.

One of the men working across the street had left his truck’s headlights on. None of his coworkers seemed to have noticed. So I stopped to let him know…and in the process, to thank him for the ungawdly job he’s doing to keep our neighborhood functioning. He was kinda nonplussed by that…but then he seemed to get a kick out of it.

😀

It’s damn near too hot to breathe out there! How our guys manage to do physical work on days like this…well, it just mystifies me.

About all I could manage was to stumble around the block — short route — and stagger back into the house.

No: I can’t plunge into the pool. At noon on an Arizona day, that’s an invitation to skin cancer.

So here we are, loafing in the AC and scarfing cheddar on bread. Boring, but at least we’re still alive.

That’s something. I guess.

The Music of the Morning

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Coming on to mid-morning here in the Funny Farm’s backyard. And…oh my goodness, what a lovely place, what a lovely symphony!

What we have out here in the side yard, where we take our morning dose of caffeine, is BIRDS. Hordes of wondrous birds.

Just now, the Bird Theater is dominated by a flock of beautiful doves. A slew of white-wings waddle around out here, grumbling at each other and searching for the seeds I’ve failed to put out this morning. Those critters do make for a fine start to the day.

A variety of songbirds are holding forth, as we scribble. What a symphony! Tweedle tweedle twee cheepee cheepee cheepee cheepee TWEE-uu TWEE-uu chirpita chirpita chirpita squaaaa squaaaa chirp chirp chirp chirp!!!!

Too delightful for words.

Hm. Maybe that’s why birds don’t have words???

  • I should take the dawg for a walk, before this gorgeous morning turns hot.
    • Too lazy. Who, me? set my coffee down???
  • I should drag the hoses around the yard.
    • Too lazy. What? get off my duff???
  • I should go back to bed.
    • Too lazy. That would entail getting off my duff and hiking to the bedroom…

Ohhhh well!  What can I say? Other than, maybe, Let’s go back to bed! 

BELAY that Last Post!!!!

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Forgodsake. Look at this morning’s FaM Post. Read that, and then say to yourself, with sterling accuracy and common sense, My gawd! The woman has lost every marble she ever had!  And THEN some!!!!! 

My imaginative little discovery, contingent on my son stealing my car out of my garage — “I don’t need a car to get around here! ” — turns out to be the single stupidest thing I’ve ever thought, said, or written. 

Yeah.

Today, as the sun made its way across the sky, I took it into my thick little head to walk down to the Albertson’s supermarket and pick up some dog food for Ruby the Corgi. While I was in the vicinity, I wanted to talk with a lawyer who practices in that shopping center — no, nothing drastic… Just a business matter. So: grabbed my home-made roller cart and headed on down there!

  • Walked.
  • And walked.
  • And dodged panhandlers.
  • And walked.
  • And fried.
  • And walked.
  • And fried some more.
  • And walked…..
  • Holeeeeee shee-ut!

The business lawyers whose office I’d seen so often in that shopping center were…GONE!!! Their space was empty.

Dayum!

The other lawyers, the ones across the parking lot, said they don’t do business law. But if I ever get arrested for drunk driving…. 😀

Yeah. 😮

By now, I was just fricasseed!

Went into the supermarket; hung out with the security guards for awhile. They put up with me, kindly, while I cooled down a bit.

But…now I had to get home. And that entailed walking block after block after block after block through searing, GAWDAWFUL heat.

Honestly: for a few minutes there, I wasn’t at all sure I was gonna make it.

Got up to the church. No one there; all the doors locked. Just a couple of bums hanging out in the shade.

Stumbled across the vast, black asphalt church parking lot. Staggered into the ‘Hood. Hotter and hotter and hotter….

Trudged and trudged through the residential part of our ‘hood. Hoped my neighbor Tom would be out…he and his wife Carol would let me inside to cool off, and keep me there long enough to be sure I wouldn’t pass out.

Nope. No sign of those two.

Hauled the empty cart along, and hauled it, and hauled it, and hauled it. Finally came to my house…not at all sure I could make it through the courtyard to the front door.

But I did: unlocked the door (clumsily: hands not working well) and staggered into the house.

And now here I yam, parked in front of the wonderful table fan. Dog snoozing on the floor: thank GAWD I didn’t take it into my feeble little head to take her with me this afternoon!

It’s much, much hotter than I’d estimated: 108 degrees, sez Wunderground. That may be an understatement!

At any rate, I made it home (miraculously!) and am now cooled down.

I guess I’m going to have to go out and rent another car — or maybe buy one. Obviously, I can’t get around on foot, not in this heat.

My ears are whistling.

My heart is pounding.

I probably should go to the ER. But without a car and through this unholy heat, how on earth would I get there?